Death Eaters VS Order of the Phoenix Club
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Me, Myself, and I

দ্বারা Rita Skeeter

Exclusive interview with notorious Death Eater Bellatrix Lestrange

Here I am, sitting in the private dungeon of the notorious Bellatrix Lestrange, most feared follower of the Dark Lord, and having a completely normal interview. Read on to see if there’s আরো to Bellatrix than just madness and a nasty reputation!

RS: Hello!

BL: *growls*

RS: Do আপনি mind if I use a quick-quotes quill?

BL: What’s that?

*fingers wand handle threateningly*

RS: Oh, nothing, erm, moving on…Can I call আপনি Bella?

BL: No.

RS: How would আপনি describe your relationship with the man known as Lord Voldemort

*Bellatrix turns pink, then regains composture*

BL: I am his most loyal follower! I, who spent years in Azkaban for him!

RS: Riiiiight, I’m sure that was a real big help, now-

*Bellatrix reaches for wand again*

BL: Do আপনি doubt me, আপনি FILTHY HALF-BLOOD!

RS: uh, no, of course not, now, what would আপনি say is your পছন্দ spell?

BL: CRUCIO!! Would আপনি like a demonstration?

*Bellatrix laughs evilly and reaches for wand again*

RS: No need for that, now, er, why do আপনি like it so much?

BL: It’s so much fun to cause innocent people pain! HAHAHA! And I give filthy mudbloods and half-bloods what they deserve. *cackles evilly* I also like Avada Kedavra, but not as much since it doesn’t actually cause people insufferable pain, *Cackles again*.

RS: *uncomfortably* Right, er, moving on, how do আপনি feel before going out on missions for the Dark Lord? Uncomfortable? Excited? Guilty?

*Bellatrix leans অগ্রবর্তী and looks at my লেখা pad*

BL: I CAN be nice! Like if someone begs me to kill them it’s not like I ignore that altogether reasonable request!

RS: Okay, moving on again, what are your main goals in life?

BL: To torture as many innocent people as possible, especially filthy mudbloods, kill muggles, do the Dark Lords bidding, make out with the Dark Lor-er, nothing

*Bellatrix turns pink*

RS: Mmmhmm, very interesting, now, how do আপনি feel about the way J.K. Rowling has written about আপনি in the Harry Potter Books? Do আপনি feel she has done আপনি justice?

BL: I HATE THE STUPID TITLE! The series should be called something আরো like “The Dark Lords quest for blood purification and the filthy half-blood idiot who stood in his way and eventually died a painful death”

RS: Hmmm, and how do আপনি feel about your death at the hands of Molly Weasley?

BL: DO NOT SPEAK OF IT! THAT STUPID HALF-BLOOD-FILTHY-BLOOD-TRAITOR-FAT-UNTALENTED-SEVEN-KIDS-UGLY-HOUSEWITCH DID NOT DESERVE TO KILL ME! THE DARK LORD MOST LOYAL FOLLOWER! I COULD DEFEAT HER WITH MY WAND TIED BEHIND MY BACK! I WILL HAVE JUSTICE!! CRUCIO! CRUCIO! CRUCIO! AVADA KEDAVRA!

*As I was running for my life, I was forced to conclude my highly informative interview with Bellatrix Lestrange*
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Credit: f***yeahslytherin.tumblr.com
I found these fascinating, thought আপনি guys might too, :)
And yeah, it's not ALL Death Eaters, but they're all Slytherins, :P


Bellatrix - “Bella” is a construct of the word “bellum” meaning “war” and “trix” refers to “a woman in power.” Bellatrix is therefore known as the “Female Warrior” and is also the pale yellow তারকা indicating the left shoulder of the constellation Orion, the Great Hunter.

Blaise - Blaise was the teacher of Merlin. From the Roman name Blasius, which means “lisping.” From the Latin “blaesus.” A famous bearer...
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