I don't care anymore. Just put me out of my misery already

I was once in the pit of all darkness...
Where all my fears and anything and everything didn't matter.... where nothing helped.
No love.
No help.
No one cared.
At least... thats how it felt...
No one noticed because of the mask, the mask everyone see's...

I felt like everyone would either be better off if I just DIED অথবা might even throw a party!
Ha! I used to think thats what they all wanted they just acted nice.
I felt I didn't deserve there kindess.
Thats what I 'thought'.
Every night crying my self asleep,
every night thinking of how to kill my self,
every night praying...

praying God would kill...

What exactly is depression? Is it when আপনি stab your arm, just to feel? Is it a broken heart, a sense of feeling but nothing?

Depression is walking slow, afraid.
Depression are the cuts and scars on your body, haunting every little piece of আপনি that's about to crumble.

Depression is a loss, a death of what আপনি were, who আপনি are now.

Depression is a disorder, depression is anything but normal.

Depression is a child screaming for help as a parent holds it's neck.

Depression is a teenager trying to fit in their new school, just trying to make a friend.


Depression is an adult, hunting for that job...