Standing on the balcony staring up at the night sky, he took comfort in the stars. They were so beautiful, yet so simple. The exact opposite of his life right now. For the first time in a very long time, Chuck খাদ was scared, terrified even.
As his gaze moved to look at the lights of the city below him, he thought back to the দিন of Bart's funeral.
Blair had finally ব্যক্ত those three words, she finally admitted she loved him, and she tried giving him comfort, the comfort and প্রণয় he so desperately needed, and she wanted to be there for him. But he pushed her away, he wouldn't -- couldn't so those words, he hurt her...again. When he had shown up at the Waldorf residence that evening, the only thing he could think of was that he needed her - his Blair. His Blair who also loved him. When she had walked into her room and found him sitting on her bed, broken and lost...she took him in her arms, and he finally let his tears falls. He had stayed with her, and she held him tenderly, forgetting about his behavior that had hurt her just hours earlier.
She held him close to an ঘন্টা before he couldn't fight it any longer, and drifted into a light sleep, while Blair just laid curled up behind him, still holding him, and watching him as he slept. He awoke a short time later, fear, pain and sadness gripping at every inch of his very being. While sleeping, he had realized that he was now alone. His father was gone. He was the only family he really had left, since he never had his mother. He was alone, and he had no family, he had no one. And as much as Chuck খাদ was independent, and made everyone believe he needed no one...he did.
Despite their rocky relationship, he at least knew that his father couldn't very well leave him. Especially since Bart খাদ never did anything that would be bad for his image and his reputation. Because of that, Chuck knew he would always have his father, at least in some smalls ways অথবা aspects. He at least had someone, he had family, even if mostly just in name. So when he had woken up in complete fear and panic, Blair had been there to soothe him.
"Hey, it's okay...go back to sleep," she had whispered softly, stroking his hair back off of his face. His body stiffened, and he began to tremble. "It's okay, Chuck, you're not alone, I'm here and -," she paused, hesitant for a second, "I প্রণয় you", she held him tighter until he turned himself to face her. His eyes held such sadness, and at the same time such emptiness. He needed her, he needed to feel loved and wanted in any way that he could, and he needed to know that he wasn't alone. He could only think of one way to do that. He softly captured her lips with his, his চুম্বন being full of need and tenderness, but she gently stopped him after a moment.
"Chuck, it's been a really hard দিন for you, আপনি should try and sleep," she spoke softly, thinking that the best thing for him would be to just rest. But the instant the words left her lips, she seen the look on his face, and the fear and sadness in his eyes, and a stray tear drop slid down his cheek. It was what he felt he needed, she could feel his need, and she loved him and all she wanted was to bring him comfort. She didn't speak a word, she barely even nodded, but he seen the slight nod, and with that he brought his lips back to hers.
That night, they had made love. It wasn't rushed, অথবা full of lust, this time it was tender and gentle, and completely different than the other times they had been together. Blair had made sure he felt loved, and wanted, and she made sure he felt that he wasn't alone. She had stared into his eyes the whole time they had made love, and she watched as an uncontrolled tear fell from his eye, which she gently wiped away.
Afterwards, as he laid there with Blair snuggled up behind him, her arms still wrapped around him, he had fallen asleep, and so had she. He woke up almost two hours later, and he knew he had to leave, that for Blair's sake, he should leave. She deserved someone who could tell her they প্রণয় her. She deserved to be treated right, and all he did was hurt her. The idea of hurting her আরো made his হৃদয় ache even more, and it was too much for him to bear. So he wrote a note, telling her he was sorry for everything, and that she deserved better. He also wrote not to come looking for him. When she awoke to an empty bed, she found his note where his sleeping form had been...and just like that, he hurt her again.
It has been two months since his father's death, and he was only just finally starting to put the pieces of his life back together. To the rest of the world, he may have seemed composed, and thought to be doing well. However, in the privacy of suite 1812, he would let the hurt, and the anger out, and afterwards would try drowning his emotions with endless amounts of scotch.
Within those two weeks, his breakdowns, and fits of anger and sorrow slowly became less and less. He still had times where it would just hit him all of a sudden, and a wave of emotion would wash over him. However, now that he was finally coming to terms with what happened to his father...another bomb just came crashing down around him. One that terrified him, and occupied most of his waking thoughts, haunting him, and shaking him to his very core. It was why he was hiding out behind the door numbered 1812.
Word is that Chuck খাদ has been hiding out in his suite for days now. But what we want to know is, what is the brooding খাদ trying to hide from?
আপনি know আপনি প্রণয় me, xoxo