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posted by Chandlerfan
OK, this is an AU kind of fic from House's POV, and how he really perceives Cuddy and Wilson. I'm only লেখা about those two because he knows them আরো than the ducklings/new team. Sorry if they seem out of character.
Anyway, enjoy! =D

Another Monday came along so quickly, I barely had time to enjoy my weekend properly. I didn't mind too much though, contrary to what others believe. All in all, I had a decent day; in comparison to any other day, that is. As usual, I managed to annoy the two people I care most about: my best friend and my boss. They know I mean well. At least I hope they do. People often assume I'm too miserable to enjoy anyone's company. But it's not true: I enjoy their company. I just don't say anything to make it so.

I came in quite early and saw those two people. First Cuddy, then Wilson. No one else, not a single other soul present in the hospital. Just us three. Workaholics, some might say. Those two definitely are; me, on the other hand, I'm anything but a workaholic. At least, that's what I believe.

As soon as I entered the hospital, I headed straight for the office of Dr Lisa Cuddy. I couldn't tell whether she was happy to see me অথবা not; all those mixed signals!

'House? You're early today.' Lisa Cuddy, always one for stating the obvious at the start of every conversation.

'Couldn't sleep.' I try to be nonchalant, but দ্বারা the look on her face, I know she doesn't believe me.

'Right, so bugging me is a cure for insomnia. Well in about half an ঘন্টা আপনি can go off to do clinic duty. That should get আপনি tired'

'Sometimes, I don't know why I come in early. Then I realise that আপনি have an ass; always the first thing I see when I come in here early enough.' I know, it's a cheap shot, but I'm Gregory House, renowned for my snarky comments. I have to live upto that, right?

With that last comment, Cuddy has her mouth wide open in shock, disgust. Perhaps she's secretly flattered, who knows? But before she can say anything in reply, I walk as quickly as a man with a limp can.

Next, I head upstairs to the office of Dr James Wilson. As always he's going through patient files when I enter his office.

'Hello House.' He says without even looking up, in a familiar tone, far from surprise, and I think, How can I only surprise one of them, but not the other. Why not both?

'Jimmy! You're early!' I say in an annoyingly cheerful tone.

It worked. He looks up slightly bemused.

'I'm always early. You, on the other hand, it's a rarity.' He retorts. Damn.

With nothing to say in reply, I walk out of his office and into mine.

As I am sat there in my office, with plenty of time to think, honestly. I ponder. I write. Yes, I write. About the two people I care the most about. It's not like I'll ever tell them any of this. They'll never find out either. I just need to write down my honest feelings about these two. The reasons why I care. I just need to put pen to paper. When I'm done, it'll be paper to bin, অথবা better still, shredder. Then they'll never know, and I'll retain my dignity.

First I start with Cuddy:
Lisa Cuddy, the woman with the zesty bod.
In all honesty, I care about this woman আরো than myself. It really does break my excuse of a হৃদয় when she so desperately wants a baby, but doesn't have time for a proper relationship to do it the original way, and has three failed IVF attempts behind her. But I still admire her for being the strong woman she is. I feel we fit together, in the awkward way a child fits two mismatched jigsaw pieces together. If the child can make it work, so can we. Yes, I admit it to no one but this piece of paper: I want a relationship with Lisa Cuddy. I want Lisa. It's her who marks a permanent smile on my heart. It's her who makes me really think. It's her who I প্রণয় to tease endlessly, and who loves to tease me so. It's her who I love. Yes, love. আরো than I thought possible to ever প্রণয় anyone. Even though I seem তিক্ত about love. I প্রণয় Lisa.

After লেখা that last line, tears start to threaten me, trying to force their way down my cheeks. Cold tears. But I fight them.

Next, I সরানো on to Wilson:
He is my best friend, and he stands দ্বারা me through everything, no matter how much I mess up. He's a man with a big heart. He just keeps on giving, not caring about himself, but always putting others first, even people who don't deserve it, like me. Yes, me. I know I don't deserve a friend like Wilson. But I'm too selfish to really want to push him away. He understands me, and truth be told, that's a feat in itself. Everyone loves him. Even though he's cheated, twice, women swoon over him. And it's his personality. The way he is nice to everyone he meets. No hard feelings. He's a generous man. He thrives on people needing him. In relationships that always backfires. He has a need to 'fix' whoever he is with, then he marries them, when they've been fixed and they are happy, with অথবা without him, he loses interest. he finds someone else to fix. It's the same in friendships. At least where I'm concerned. He knows deep down I need him, however much I may deny it, and so he doesn't walk away from me. He's my best friend and my only friend.

After লেখা this, I consider shredding them like I had initially planned. But I don't, I shove them into my bottom drawer, pop some vicodin and get on with the rest of the day.

Then there was the end of the day. The end of any chance of happiness. As I walked past Wilson's office, I realised he wasn't in. I figured he was dealing with a patient, so left him to do so and headed straight for Cuddy's office. I was just about to enter and I could hear another voice, so I stopped short and being me, decided to eavesdrop. Oh, how I wish I hadn't.

'As আপনি know, I've been trying for a baby, and I'm not getting any younger, so....' Cuddy tearfully said. Who else could possibly know that Cuddy wants a baby, except for me? I thought she told me because, for some reason, she trusted me. But I'm not the only one.

'I know, Lisa. I know what you're asking. And yes, I'll do it. Let's try for a baby.' The other voice, a man I assume, answered. I just couldn't place it. Who was it?

'Thank আপনি James! That's why I প্রণয় you!' Cuddy replied all too happy.

James? Who could that be....

Then it hit me. It was Wilson. Wilson? Of all people to fall in প্রণয় with, she falls for Wilson. I just couldn't believe it.

My best friend and my boss?

My best friend and my boss are having a baby. Together.

The হৃদয় made of sorry stone that I possess had been broken. Shattered into tiny pieces. So small, it couldn't be put back together. And all because the two people I care most about are in love. This is not how I planned my life to turn out. There were only two things I really wanted in life: Lisa Cuddy as my beautiful wife, and James Wilson as my partner in crime, my best friend, always. The one dream I had been longing for, broken, like my heart.

Now I have no reason to be happy.

There আপনি go guys. I know it's kind of different but I thought I'd give it a shot.
Btw, in case আপনি don't already know, I'm a full time Huddy shipper, not Wuddy. =]
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