মাই লিটল পনি ফ্রেন্ডশিপ ইজ ম্যাজিক Club
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Half an ঘন্টা later, Harry went to grab some lunch. There was place he always enjoyed going to called Dou Chebag's.

Harry: *enters restaurant*
Dou: Harry, how's it going?
Harry: Hello Mr. Chebag, how are you?
Dou: Wonderful. Would আপনি like your usual?
Harry: I think I'll surprise আপনি this time. Only chili today.
Dou: আপনি got it. *looks out window* A lot of polution out there, it's not good.
Harry: No it isn't. Why can't we have clean streets for once?
Dou: We live in a town of crime.
Harry: Yeah *sees bank* I need আপনি to make a call.
Dou: What for?
Harry: Tell the police that there's a bank robbery on 7th Avenue.
Dou: Ok, here's your hotdog.
Harry: Thanks. *eats hotdog* Now, just wait for the calvary to arrive.

But when Harry finished his hotdog, the alarm at the bank went off.

Harry: Oh damnit.
robbers: *exit bank*
Harry: *walks down রাস্তা with gun*
robbers: *pull out shotgun*
Harry: HALT!
robbers: *shoot gun*
Harry: *shoots shotgun carrying burglar*
burglars: *get in car*
Harry: *shoot driver*
driver: *crashes into firehydrant*
burglars: *get out*
Harry: *shoots both burglars*
civilians: *scream, and run*
Harry: *notices leg* They shot me
shotgun carrying burglar: *lays on ground*
Harry: *goes toward burglar*
burglar: *reaches for gun*
Harry: Uh uh. I know what you're thinking. Did he আগুন six shots, অথবা only five? To tell আপনি the truth I হারিয়ে গেছে track myself after all this excitement. *shows gun* Being this is a .44 magnum, the most powerful handgun in all of Equestria, and will blow your head clean off. আপনি gotta ask yourself a question. Do I feel lucky?
Burglar: *silent*
Harry: Well do আপনি punk?
Burglar: *does nothing*
Harry: *takes shotgun*
Burglar: Hey. I got's to know.
Harry: *pulls trigger*

Nothing happened. And as Harry walked from the dying criminal, the police arrived.

2 B continued.
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Tom was now making fun of the modern movie industry.

Tom: As much as I enjoy being an actor, when I'm not entertaining আপনি with jokes.
Crowd: *Quietly laughing*
Tom: I always want to make sure the movie I'm in is good. They're not all comedies, my most সাম্প্রতিক film, Suicide was actually quite dark. Yet for some reason, comedians feel like it's a great way to improve their career. Correct me if I'm wrong, but being in a dramatic R-rated film will not improve your comedy career.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: That's why no one knows who Jim Carrey is anymore.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: His সাম্প্রতিক role as Dr. Robotnik...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Tom continued insulting politicians, much to the delight of his audience.

Tom: Presidential candidates are always a good target for comedians to make fun of, but আপনি know what another জনপ্রিয় target is? Black Lives Matter.
Crowd: *Cheering*
Tom: Many black ponies are accusing millions of ponies of the Caucasian race, for something only one police officer did in the Midwest!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Who's the racist now আপনি assholes?!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: And do আপনি really think that every single Caucasian hates blacks?! When did we time travel back to the 18th Century?!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Even the...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
What's a comedy প্রদর্শনী without politics? Tom is going to make fun of the presidential election.

Tom: I don't know what's worse, this covid pandemic, অথবা the presidential election.
Crowd: Yeah!!!
Tom: I don't trust either Trump, অথবা Biden so I'm not going to vote. *Talks like a filly* But Tom, it's important for the economy!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Losing jobs, and spending money on taxes is not good for the economy!
Crowd: *Cheering*
Tom: I don't give a fuck what ponies tell me. I don't trust the president, I don't trust the princess, I don't trust anyone that works for the Equestrian government! Why?...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
After mentioning things আপনি should only do alone, Tom had another segment for his audience to enjoy.

Tom: আপনি know one thing I like to do when I'm alone? Rewatch some episodes of On The Block.
Crowd: *Cheering*
Tom: Not only do I enjoy comedy, but I also enjoy being an actor. It's the only job where আপনি can get away with murder.
Crowd: *Quietly laughing*
Tom: Unless you're Robert Deniro, and the main protagonist is Al Pacino.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Seeing those two together was a lot of fun, but what really surprised me was seeing Pacino as a cop. He's normally the criminal, but I still got a kick...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!


St. Foalis Maressouri, 6 PM.

A crowd of thousands of ponies gathered at the Gateway Arch to experience a comedy প্রদর্শনী that was being filmed live in 4k. The comedian? Tom Foolery.

Crowd: *Clapping, and chanting* Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom!
Tom: *Arrives at a temporary stage under the Gateway Arch*
Crowd: *Cheering, as they continue to clap*
Tom: Thank আপনি everypony.
Crowd: *Continuing to cheer and clap*
Tom: Thank আপনি very much.
Crowd: *Continuing to cheer and clap*
Tom: And shut up.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom:...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog


Jerry: Sorry, but I got nothing.
Vito: I don't feel like dying. That's the reason we left the family in the first place.
Harlan: *Hears a car* What's that? *Looks out the window*
Vito: What is it?
Harlan: A cop.

The three stallions started to panic, but Vito had a plan.

Vito: I think I know what to do. Go upstairs and let me handle this.
Police Pony: *Rings the doorbell*
Vito: *Opens the door* How can I help আপনি officer?
Police Pony: We got a complaint a while ago. Apparently this morning, some ponies had a gunfight just in front of your house. আপনি know anything about this?
Vito: No. I was riding...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
What to expect in this episode.

Twilight Sparkle: *In a black পরিবর্তনযোগ্য with two Royal Guards. A bullet hits the door of the পরিবর্তনযোগ্য they're in*
Royal Guard: Princess, get down!

---

Captain Jefferson: Someone tried to assassinate the princess as she entered our town.

---

Twilight: Why would somepony want me dead?
Toby: That's what we're trying to find out.

---

Tim: *Gets punched three times দ্বারা a blue unicorn. He gets punched one আরো time, and his glasses break*

Intro
Song: link

Julia: *Driving her police car on the round freeway*
Tim: *Sitting পরবর্তি to her*

Gran Turismo

Starring Larry Wilcox as Tim...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
What to expect in this week's episode.

Tim: You're splitting us up?
Captain Jefferson: Just until Saturday. Someone's gotta teach the new guys what to do.

---

Pony: *Driving a sports car* Turn on the nitrous.
Pony 2: *Turns on the nitrous*
Pony: *Going faster*

---

Captain Jefferson: These two guys are wanted দ্বারা the State Troopers, both in this state, and in Pennsylvania.
Tim: *Driving after the bad guys*
Captain Jefferson: We gotta be on our game.
Tim: *Hits another car, and goes on two wheels*

Song: link

Julia: *Driving her police car on the round freeway*
Tim: *Sitting পরবর্তি to her*

Gran Turismo

Starring...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
When Saten Twist returned to Los Angeles in the Super Chief, he saw Jake looking at him.

Jake: *Angry*
Saten: *Sweating* Why is he giving me that look? *Stops the train*
Jake: *Tapping his left front hoof on the ground, waiting for Saten Twist*
Saten: *Climbs down from the engine's cab* Why are আপনি angry at me?
Jake: আপনি owe me an apology for the way আপনি talked to me yesterday.
Saten: John-
Jake: IT'S JAKE!!!!
Saten: Why are আপনি getting angry at me all of a sudden?
Jake: Your lecture towards me made me lose my job, and now I can't find work anywhere else.
Saten: আপনি quit?
Jake: Yeah. I'm still waiting...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!


Song: link
 Celestia: *Runs from the left. She jumps up, her wings spreading wide, then her face gets into the triangle*
Celestia: *Runs from the left. She jumps up, her wings spreading wide, then her face gets into the triangle*


Albuquerque, New Mexicolt. July 19th, 1958

Saten Twist: *Walking towards the Super Chief*
Stallion 16: Here to take this train all the way to Los Angeles?
Saten Twist: *Nods, and climbs into the cab*
Conductor: All aboard!!
Saten Twist: *Blows the horn twice, and makes the train go forward*
 This is the train Saten Twist is driving, called the Super Chief. A luxury train for ponies.
This is the train Saten Twist is driving, called the Super Chief. A luxury train for ponies....
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Oh shit, BT's not making fun of someone this time around? (well in an indirect way I might be but let's see where this goes)

Yeah, I don't care if anyone reads this, I just want to get this off of my chest, because I'm gonna try and be real with this site for once and it's 1 AM in the morning.

One thing I've noticed in the time that i've been a part of this club (since like, 2012 অথবা something, idk), is that this club has হারিয়ে গেছে its backbone. The সাম্প্রতিক year, now, I've been shitposting like mad, pissing in everyone's cornflakes. I have admittedly been the worst kind of person, for NO good reason....
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: facebook, EQD
posted by SomeoneButNoone
My name? Alonzo Langusa. Age when I started operating? 23.


Act II

Vengeance...

Living was hard. I had to hide my name. I had to find a good job yet there was not enough money. Life was rough and it was because of these man. Vincent Galar, Apollo Monetto and Angelo Vertezio. I was taught দ্বারা ma'am Crossroad not to kill. Yet I wanted to. I wanted vengeance. At age of 15 I started smoking and further drinking at age of 17 until at age of 23 I was kicked from my apartment. I went to Canterlot to find my good old friend her name was Clara. When I came she was shocked. I still remember it.


"Who are you?"...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
It was a cold night like this one when my father smoked his last cigarette in our family house. The night so cold even me myself did not want to go out. The time? As a kid আপনি don't care about that. It was dark, and it was winter. বড়দিন day. After Equestrian economical fall and industrial boom, everyone changed, the dirty mafias started to leak. My father was part of one of these. A high up. One of important people in Vertezio familia. Still on that night...

Act I

That Night...

"So how was your দিন outside" Father asked me with a smile. "Good" was all I answered. I was 11 what could I say....
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আপেল Bloom: ... Who'd've thought it'd be so hard to find somethin' for us all to do together?

Scootaloo: Well, I know this might sound crazy, but what if we didn't?

Apple Bloom: Didn't what?

Scootaloo: Do things together. Well, do everything together.

Apple Bloom: But we're the Cutie Mark Crusaders!

Scootaloo: And we always will be! But I really wanna bungee jump! The speed, the height, the fall!

Sweetie Belle: And I know আপনি two aren't interested, but I wanna try : Isn't there something you've always wanted to do on your own?

Apple Bloom: I don't know... I guess I figured we'd always do stuff together....
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: ফেসবুক
posted by SomeoneButNoone
Darkness - *burst into room* Bad news! Void was kidnapped!
Dan - What?!
Snowflake - Void...


----
Location - ???
---

Void - *wakes up strapped to some টেবিল covered with bandages* What the...
Nyx - Good দিন VOID. I never thought আপনি will be the first to feel truth.
Void - What are you- *looks at him and see big machine behind him*
Nyx - Ah আপনি see this. My project. ফলমূল of my reschearch. The best weapon ever. আপনি know - cores are great aren't they. They stay alive for 20 years. But আপনি know what is better in them. Their power. A sheer power that may সরানো body অথবা stimulate brain. And this সেকেন্ড thing...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Tim, and Julia returned to the police station.

Captain Jefferson: Tim Miller, and Julia Rose.
Tim: Hello Captain.
Captain Jefferson: I heard about your heroic act on Monday Avenue. Well done.
Julia: Don't give us all of the credit Captain. There were other officers as well.
Captain Jefferson: I understand. When I see them, I'll give them their congrats as well.
Tim: We still on stakeout tomorrow Captain?
Captain Jefferson: That's right. You're on stakeout until further notice.

Next day.

Tim: *Driving his সর্প passing Local Consideration*
Julia: Let's check out The Highway.
Tim: *Turns right on Byer Lane*...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
Epilouge.
----------------
5 Years later.
----
Canterlot
13th May
---
Sandman - 13th of may...
Mare - A really fearful দিন huh?
Sandman - Damn right. I saw this city burn. I saw it die slowly.
Mare - It's okay. It's not rebuilded fully but it has buty it had before.
Sandman - Maybe but Eiffla tower won't be fixed. New York statue the same.
Mare - You're right on that...
---
Ice - Damn it's hot this may.
Fire - Yeah. It was quiet hot that দিন too.
Ice - Damn right.

----
Colt - Dad tell me about the war!
Damien - Well your dad fought for city we live in - Canterlot. আপনি know it was hard but your daddy wanted to...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Date: April 12, 1963
Location: Cheyenne Wyoming
Time: 8:46 AM
Railroad: Union Pacific

Stylo walked into the station, and was going to talk to Pete, when he came out of his office.

Pete: There আপনি are Stylo. I need আপনি to come here.
Stylo: Perfect. I was just on my way to see you. *Enters Pete's office*

They say down at Pete's desk

Stylo: Sir,
Stylo & Pete: If I may start fir-
Audience: *Laughing*
Stylo & Pete: It's fine, আপনি can-
Audience: *Laughing*
Stylo & Pete: Wanna go first?
Audience: *Laughing*
Pete: আপনি go first.
Stylo: Okay. I've had it with Mike destroying our stuff on this railroad....
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