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Can anybody help me with social skills? I need it BAD.

My name is Matt. I am 14 years old, and in 8th grade. I have always had problems with being social, and about a বছর ago, I found out why. I was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome in the 2nd grade, but for whatever reason, my parents never bothered to tell me. I guess they didn't think it was a big deal. I found out one দিন on the weekend, when I found a book about Aspergers which belonged to them. I asked them about it, and they told me that I had been diagnosed. Ever since then, my social skills have gone down lower and lower and lower. And it's REALLY not easy being an aspie when আপনি are in junior high, with all these jerks running around with their cool clothes and trends and phrases that I CANNOT pick up on! Everyone thinks they can just feed off of me like a school of piranhas, because I don't have a single freaking clue about what I should say to them! And to make things worse, my only friend, who had learned to accept me for who I was, is no longer at my school, and is not coming back. Nobody understands me. Not even my parents. They try, but they just don't get it. I also have a really big problem with focusing on the positive side of life, and my parents and teachers are always getting mad at me for being too negative. And I am starting to think that I may have A.D.D as well, because I CANNOT pay attention in class. It is almost impossible. But right now, I am trying to improve my social skills, because it seems আরো important to me than the academic part(being a teen and all), and they cannot get any worse if I want any chance at all of surviving 4 আরো years of school. From being on ফ্যানপপ for a while, I have found that there are many people who share the same problems as me. If anyone can give me tips on being social, I would appreciate it a LOT, because my skills have hit rock bottom, and I don't think I can take much more.

Thank আপনি for listening.
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Well everyone has some sort of problem. Socializing is a problem for আপনি while I have a problem with my temper. Everyone has some sort of problem it's just some people don't know what is it.
TheSpartan9000 posted বছরখানেক আগে
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Thanks to everyone who has প্রদত্ত me suggestions. It really means a lot to me.
swampfox31 posted বছরখানেক আগে
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I'm here for আপনি and try starting a conversation whit some one whit a subject আপনি know :) <3
ZWEBB22 posted বছরখানেক আগে
 swampfox31 posted বছরখানেক আগে
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যেভাবে খুশী উত্তর

TheSpartan9000 said:
Well... Why not talk to people here on Fanpop? It can really improve your social skills. And if আপনি never think positive, আপনি would never get anything positive.
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posted বছরখানেক আগে 
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Thank you, I will try doing that. But with the positive thoughts, I know I need to do it, but figuring out HOW to do it is the problem for me.
swampfox31 posted বছরখানেক আগে
prophet69 said:
As far as developing your communication and social skills are concerned, itis often a matter of finding common ground with someone. If আপনি are fearing judgment, censorship, অথবা being ostracized, it will be hard to find common ground with people. আপনি feel less intimidated when আপনি have a common interest that draws আপনি close to each other.
Here are some suggestions on how to find common ground with others:
1. Learn to be a good listener. Make sure your body language reflects that আপনি are listening. Many people are just looking for someone they can talk to. If they feel that they can talk to you, then they will be much আরো inclined to listen to you.
2. Learn to ask good questions. People who know how to ask the right প্রশ্ন at the right time do very well in socializing with others. Sometimes it is not what আপনি say, but what আপনি ask that endears people to you. The right প্রশ্ন will help আপনি find common ground and tell the person আপনি are talking to that আপনি are interested.
3. Learn to laugh at yourself. If আপনি walk around self-conscious, people will be আরো paranoid around you. But if আপনি can laugh at yourself, then others will feel আরো comfortable around আপনি too. The first step in feeling easy around others is to first feel easy around yourself.
4. Be hard to offend. If আপনি have a chip on your shoulder, people won't want to be around you. Don't look for the bad in others--you'll always find it. Much of it will be misunderstood and will only create আরো fear in your further interactions.
There are many আরো things আপনি can do. Helpful source: link
People have a hard time opening up because of some fear. Perhaps it is a fear of rejection, of being made fun of, of feeling like the odd man out, অথবা just not feeling like আপনি can really relate to their life, struggles, concerns, and care. If this is you, it is important to isolate what this fear really is and why আপনি have it.Overcoming that fear অথবা at least controlling it is the পরবর্তি step to feeling comfortable talking to others.
Anyway, I hope this helps!
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posted বছরখানেক আগে 
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This helps a lot. Thank you.
swampfox31 posted বছরখানেক আগে
Bond_Of_Fury said:
Autism, huh? *shakes hand* Hi there.

I have a form of autism to (not asperger though, mind you) and I can identify my younger self in আপনি a bit.

What I would recommend to আপনি is to যোগদান a sports club for teamsports such as ভলিবলখেলা অথবা soccer. If I have found anything that helped me socialize with others, it is দ্বারা working together to be the best at what we do, and having a great time while we do it. You're working together, and you're all part of something. Working together like that, and having such a good time makes it easy to get along with each other well, it's like it happens spontaneously. Good luck.
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posted বছরখানেক আগে 
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Thanks, I will keep that in mind.
swampfox31 posted বছরখানেক আগে
wHateVer9974 said:
If it makes আপনি feel better my social skills are really bad too and I don't have any syndrome.You should start participating আরো in events your school organizes. You'll start meeting people and maybe আপনি can be বন্ধু with some of them. Also আপনি can ask your parents to talk to your teachers so as to help আপনি meet people too.
I hope I helped you.
I'd like to tell me what happened once আপনি try these:)
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