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Now let see how great আপনি are? :D
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posted by australia-101
37 Rude & Crude Pick-up Lines
1. I wish আপনি were a door so I could slam আপনি all day.
2. Nice legs...what time do they open?
3. Do আপনি work for UPS? I thought I saw আপনি checking out my package.
4. You've got 206 অস্থি in your body, want one more?
5. Can I buy আপনি a drink অথবা do আপনি just want the money?
6. I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
7. I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted বিছানা Thrasher: have আপনি seen one?
8. I'm fighting the urge to make আপনি the happiest woman on earth tonight.
9. Want to play army? I'll lay down and আপনি can...
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This is my শীর্ষ 14 fave sayings and উদ্ধৃতি :) Enjoy xx

14. আপনি got to swim out of your comfort zone to catch the wave thats going to change your life -Unknown
13.Sometimes your knight in shining armour, is just an idiot wrapped in tin foil -Unknown
12."God heals and the doctors takes the fee" -Unknown
11.Ever notice that "what the hell" is always the right decision -Marilyn Monroe
10.Remember the days when কালজামজাতীয় ফল and আপেল where just ফলমূল -Unknown
9.When guys get jealous, its kinda cute. When girls get jealous, World War 3 is about to start -Unknown
8.You know youre in প্রণয় when আপনি cant fall...
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posted by hetaliaitaly
1.Ride mechanical ঘোড়া বিষয়ক with coins fished out of the reflecting pool.

2.Try pants on backwards and Ask the salesperson if they make your butt look big.

3.At any clothing Stores take Heeps of stuff into the dressing room take an আইপড অথবা something and play on it while ur bored and when its time to close say "I STILL HAVE TO TRY STUFF ON IDIOT".

4.Sneeze on the খাবার sample's they have in woolworths.

5.At the bottom of an escalator, scream, “My shoelaces! Augh!” and pretend your stuck.

6.Ask the sales personnel at the সঙ্গীত store whether আপনি can get a CD that আপনি know they dont have and ask really...
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posted by LizzyTheCat
1.Hum loudly in class and when he/she tells 'the person who is humming' to keep quiet-stop but then carry on two মিনিট later.

2.Tap your foot loudly when he/she is grading tests.

3.While he/she is busy explaining something, have a huge coughing fit (make sure it's loud) and don't let her finish a sentence.

4.Push your chair in and pull it out, non-stop.

5.Sigh loudly while he/she is explaining something and look longingly at a clock (or your watch if আপনি are wearing one) and then look out the window and sigh again.

6.Pretend to be asleep during a lesson and when আপনি get woken up, scream loudly...
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posted by tokidoki123
[The Simpsons] 1F02 - Homer Goes To College #255
Homer: I've been working on a plan. During the exam, I'll hide under some coats, and hope that somehow everything will work out.
Contributed দ্বারা funnytvquotes.com



[The Simpsons] 1F05 - Bart's Inner Child #32
Skinner: Damn...they're very slowly getting away!
Moe: They're heading for the old mill!
Homer: No we're not.
Moe: Well, let's go to the old mill anyway -- get some cider!
Contributed দ্বারা funnytvquotes.com



[The Simpsons] 1F06 - Boy Scoutz 'N the ঘোমটা #86
Homer: Marge, don't discourage the boy. Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what...
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posted by PsychadelicSkye
60 Fun ways to order a pizza


1. If using a touch-tone, press যেভাবে খুশী numbers while ordering. Ask the person taking the order to stop doing that.

2. Make up a charge-card name. Ask if they accept it.

3. Order a Big Mac Extra Value Meal.

4. Terminate the call with, "Remember, we never had this conversation."

5. Tell the order taker a rival পিজা place is on the other line and you're going with the lowest bidder.

6. Give them your address, exclaim, "Oh, just surprise me!" and hang up.

7. In your breathiest voice, tell them to cut the crap about nutrition and ask if they have something outlandishly...
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posted by Wendy99
LITTLE TONY FROM BROOKLYN ON MATH

A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and আপনি shoot one of them, how many will be left ?" She calls on little TONY.

He replies, "None, they will all fly away with the first gunshot."

The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking."

Then little TONY says, "I have a প্রশ্ন for YOU."

"There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream: One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream. The সেকেন্ড is gobbling down the শীর্ষ and sucking the cone. The third is biting off the শীর্ষ of the ice cream....
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যেভাবে খুশী strangers

stare at them and as soon as আপনি notice point at them and claim they're some famous celebrity.
"OMG you're Cheryl Cole"

bump shoulders with them continually and go "eh eh eh"

yell "hey blondie" at them "how আপনি doin"

randomly start the Mexican wave then whoever doesn't যোগদান in boo and whoever does smile at them creepily.

hold your fingers together in the evil person position then laugh and stare at them.

siblings

constantly look over their shoulder at what they're doing make fart noises

tap them on the shoulder and when they look tell them it was your imaginary friend

sing really...
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posted by SymmaGirl2
Yup. শিরোনাম says it all. Let's start, shall we?

The হারিয়ে গেছে Hero...in my pants.
The Sum of all Fears...in my pants.
Green Eggs and Ham...in my pants.
Fairy School Dropout...in my pants.
Washington's Crossing...in my pants.
Diary of a Wimpy Kid...in my pants.
Lock and Key...in my pants.
Merciless...in my pants.
Citizen Soldiers...in my pants.
Joy of Cooking...in my pants.
Emotional Intellegence...in my pants.
Good to Great...in my pants.
Twenty Wishes...in my pants.
Finally...in my pants.
Cross My হৃদয় and Hope to Spy...in my pants.
I'd Tell আপনি I প্রণয় You, but then I'd Have to Kill You...in my pants.
Hannibal...
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posted by bizeshnakarki
I found this প্রবন্ধ on the internet.

1. Insist that আপনি are a vegetarian and protest anytime your roommate eats meat. Then leave "Slim Jim" wrappers on the floor and lie on the বিছানা holding your stomach every time your roommate walks in. If he/she asks about the wrappers, say আপনি know nothing about them.
2. Get some hair. Disperse it around your roommate's head while he/she is asleep. Keep a pair of scissors দ্বারা your bed. Snicker at your roommate every morning.
3. Every time your roommate walks in yell, "Hooray! You're back!" as loud as আপনি can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards,...
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posted by bizeshnakarki
I got it somewhere n thought i should share it.

101 Ways To Annoy People
1. Sing the ব্যাটম্যান theme incessantly.

2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."

3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with বন্ধু in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip..."

5. If আপনি have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

6. Amuse yourself for endless hours দ্বারা hooking a ক্যামকোর্ডার to your TV and then pointing it at the screen. <

7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.

8. Push all...
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posted by hetaliaitaly
What i feel on the inside is not what i প্রদর্শনী on the outside i dont প্রদর্শনী প্রণয় i dont know vein my life will never be the same i cant tell আপনি how i feel because the hurt deep within my হৃদয় is all so real the anger and hurt i cannot stand makes me feel like im the mist floating never going to rest in peace i dont no how i found this its maybe when people laugh and shout no matter what they say অথবা how they feel i always think my life is not real.


(over 100 teens each বছর kill themselves অথবা think suicide because of being bullied অথবা teased it doesent matter if standing up for someone helps আপনি but atleast it helps someone else and it may save a life)
posted by Juilet1234
Mittens.
They warm your hands, protect আপনি from the cold. They're not a bad thing.
But imagine if for your whole life আপনি wore heavy mittens. If আপনি dial a phone, try to use a remote control, অথবা try to play a board game, you're still wearing mittens. Practically everything is much আরো difficult.
Right there.
Practically everything is much আরো difficult.
Remember that.
Now imagine this.
You're in a room with the TV on full volume. The radio is blaring loud, screeching music. The lights are flickering on and off. Everything আপনি see is magnified, is a much bigger deal than it normally would...
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 Rose Island before its destruction
Rose Island before its destruction
-The Republic of Rose Island (Respubliko de la Insulo de la Rozol in Esperanto, the official language of the once-micronation)
-Area: .04 km (4305 sq. ft.)
-Date of foundation: June 24, 1968
-Leader: President Giorgio Rosa
-Language: Esperanto
-Currency: Mill
-Location: Adriatic Sea, between Cesnatico and Rimini, Italy

The Republic of Rose Island (Esperanto: Respubliko de la Insulo de la Rozoj) was a short-lived micronation on a man-made platform in the Adriatic Sea, 11 km (7 mi) off the coast of the province of Forlì, Italy.

In 1967, Italian engineer Giorgio Rosa funded the construction of a 400...
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posted by Thecharliejay
Act like a spy / secret agent for the day
Act like আপনি just met your friend for the first time
Act profound
Ad lib
Add some strawberries to your ice cream
Adopt strange mannerisms
Alphabetize the খাবার in your fridge
Announce your candidacy for President.
Annoy total strangers
Apply for a unicorn hunting license
Appreciate everything
Archive the Internet to 3.5" floppy disks (low density of course)
Arrest yourself
Ask a প্রশ্ন nobody can answer
Ask embarrassing questions
Ask for seconds
Ask people how to pronounce their name
Ask people if they want to see your “belly button treasure”
Ask...
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474 Things To Do When You're Bored


- Wax the ceiling
- Rearrange political campaign signs
- Sharpen your teeth
- Play Houdini with one of your siblings
- Braid your dog's hair
- Clean and polish your belly button
- Water your dog...see if he grows
- Wash a tree
- Knight yourself
- Name your child Edsel
- Scare Stephen King
- Give your cat a mohawk
- Purr
- Mow your carpet
- Play Pat Boone records backwards
- Vacuum your lawn
- Sleep on a বিছানা of nails
- DON'T toss and turn
- Boil ice cream
- Run around in squares
- Think of quadruple entendres
- Speak in acronyms
- Have your বালিশ X-rayed
- Drink straight shots...of...
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posted by hakadoshi12345
Egypt: -Slaps haka-

Egypt: T//T

Haka~: O_O

Yuki/Midna: HEY! What'd she do to you?

Soda: WHOA WHOA WHOA

Soda: -ties egypt to a বাস্কেটবল net-

Soda: WTF IS GOING ON HERE

Haka~: I didnt touch you! I touched...

Haka~: Soda o.o

Egypt: SHE গাউন MY LAST COCONUT!

Egypt: AND SHE ABUSED MY CAKE

Egypt: AND ME AND MY HUSBAND

Egypt: AND MY WHEAT

Egypt: AND MY WEED

Egypt: AND SHE ROBBED MY HOUSE OF MY LOAN

Egypt: SHE TiED UP THE নারুত FiXER!

Soda: (Is she seriously freaking out অথবা is this another strange RP?)

Egypt: She ATE SUGAR iNSTEAD OF WHEAT!

Yuki/Midna: Haka didn't do anything.

Yuki/Midna: (I have no idea.)

Egypt:...
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posted by GreenerPastures
These are some reasons why I abso-flipping-lutely প্রণয় my smashing country Kenya:
1-Its where the President of the sovereign United States of America traces his roots,albeit a little too far off.
2- Its the only place আপনি can hear phrases like:"Omera,yawa, who do আপনি think আপনি are messing with? Don't আপনি know that my brother has a friend who wipes the office of a man who makes long-distance calls to the friend of a man who works with the president of the FBI who talks face-to-face with Obama, therefore I have American blood flowing in my veins?" Yet the poor guy is as black as coal.
3-The glam...
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posted by MarMar_XigLux
What Being a Retard Online can do for You

Being a retard online will bring আপনি riches beyond your wildest dreams, hot girls and above all - attention: আপনি crave attention, আপনি absorb it like a wet sponge...Ah yes, আপনি may very suffer from ADHD but it doesn't matter: no my friend, because দ্বারা being a retard online আপনি can get all the attention আপনি need for a small fee.

Poor Literacy is Kool!

If আপনি want to be a retard আপনি must learn to spell like one, remember kids - poor literacy is cool! First of all we must take a lesson from the Image comics of old and remember that everything must be EXTREME!...
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posted by ultimatefredde
1. Guys for gods sake, dont pretend being something আপনি aren´t girls have a sixth sense we don´t have and find out sooner অথবা later

2. Dance!

3.Flirt, they aren´t the only ones who should do this.

4.Tell her what আপনি really enjoy in life

5.Help them out when needed.

6.Avoid playing those "Gay games" with your pals, it´s just not right

7.avoid grabbing your "parts" on public. Really.

8.Be original, with gifts, don´t just give flowers, অথবা take her to dinner, also sometimes a card অথবা a simple walk in the park is good to try

9.Be romantic and take shyness away

10. Express your feelings, আপনি wont die...
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