I got back to the house 6 hours later. I hugged everyone and told them sorry for freaking out. They all ব্যক্ত it was okay and that it happens. I went outside to call Nathens cellphone and he didn't answer. I left him a voicemail saying:
Hey, Its Addi.
I'm sorry for frreaking out on আপনি and I'm sorry that, I just didn't know what to do. Thanks for looking out for me, your the best.
I hung up and waited for his call back. I went to get something good to eat and to drink and then went and take a shower. it felt good to take a hot shower. It was getting late and I still hadn't heard from Nathen yet. I was getting worried, so I called him again.
নমস্কার its me again. I started off with.
I just wanted to see what আপনি were doing and that I'm really really sorry about the past few days amd that um im just sorry. Please call and let me know that your okay অথবা নিরাপদ অথবা just to talk please. I ব্যক্ত bye and then hung the phone up.
I went to school the following morning and Nathen wasn't anywhere at school. After lunch I decided to skip the rest of the দিন and see if I could find Nathen. I went to Jacobs house and ask if he had heard অথবা seen Nathen. he ব্যক্ত no but he was going to turn all wolfy and ask the other guys.
He came back with 5 মিনিট and he ব্যক্ত that none of them had seen অথবা heard from him. I ব্যক্ত thanks and bye and the left. I got really scared I drove around town and then I went to sit দ্বারা the beach. I notice that a bunch of guys were jumping off the cliff, it looked really fun. I drove up to the শীর্ষ of the cliff and went and stood not that close to the edge. I was sorta afraid of heights. I hadn't been in the water sinse Max had came and rescued me. I sat on the edge of the cliff and just started thinking. I thought about Nathen and if he was okay and why I just didn't jump off the cliff like the other guys did. I stood up careful and then all of the sudden the cliff broke right under me. I started falling, I remember in my Coast Guard training that আপনি never want to fall to your side অথবা back অথবা butt, আপনি want to fall like standing straight up. I tried to get in a standing straight but I couldn't I was falling to my shoulder, I hit the water hard harder than when the vamp let me fall to the ground the other day. Once I reserfaced to the শীর্ষ of the water I noticed people standing on the beach. I started swimming to the কূল and got there pretty quickly. Once I got there I had people asking me if I was ok and I told them yes. I started walking back to my motorcycle when I saw Nathen walking the oppisite dirrection from the cliff.
Nathen. I yelled. He didn't stop he kept walking.
Nathen I secreamed louder. No answer. I started crying a little bit he was really mad at me. Nathen I ব্যক্ত in a wisper and then I yelled Nathen as loud as I could crying it wasn't loud enough for someone that far off to hear but I knew he heard it and all the other calls I yelled.
I stood there drippng wet until he turned around and saw me. Nathen, I ব্যক্ত quietly again. He walked over not a নমস্কার অথবা anything he just ব্যক্ত What.
Luckly no one was around now.
No one is getting older except me and I... I trailed off hoping that he would understand what I was saying.
Okay, sorry আপনি are all wet. Nathen ব্যক্ত as he turned around and started walking again.
I started running after him and said;
This is why I don't open up easily to anyone, because stupid guys like আপনি come and like me and then they shut me out of their lives and it creates a bottomless pit and its hard to fill it back up. I said/ yelled.
Nathen kept walking and I stood there for a really long time. When I finally collected all my thoughts Jacob was standing beside me.
how long have আপনি been here? I ask.
Few minutes. Jacob said.
Oh, I was just looking at the pretty woods. I told him.
I don't think so. He said.
Tears started forming in my eyes again. I ব্যক্ত I was sorry, I know he is mad but I have told him sorry a lot and I don't know what else to do. I said.
Its ok he will come around.. Jacob said.
Jacob pulled me into a hug, I couldn't help the tears now, they were pouring dwon my face. I didn't know what to say. I just stood there in Jacobs arms.
I tried to explain to him why I didn't let him in so fast, but he didn't listen to me. I told Jacob.
It will be okay Addi. He said.
আপনি must be cold, Jacob ব্যক্ত he gave me his সোয়েটার that he was wearing.
Thanks I said.
Lets get আপনি home. Jaocb said.
He gave me a piggy back ride up to my motorcycle and then he got on and then I got on and he drove me home. When I got প্রথমপাতা it was dark and I went straight upstairs to get into the shower. Once I got out Jacob was still downstairs playing with Nessie and I went to find Alice.
নমস্কার Alice. I said.
নমস্কার Addi, I heard what happened. Im sorry. Alice told me.
Yeah me too. I told her.
ITs gonna be fine though. She said.
Hope so, Why have I always went for a wolf? I ask jokingly.
I don't know Addi. Alice said.
Thanks for looking out for me. I said.
No problem. She said. I don't mind at all.
Well I'm goning to bed, goodnight, প্রণয় you. I said.
goodnight, প্রণয় আপনি too. Alice said.
I walked into the living room and told everyone goodnight and I told Jacob thanks. Renesme gave me a hug before I went upstairs and she showed me Nathen was in my room, but I took it as she has seen him in there before.
I went upstairs and open my door and Nathen was sitting on the edge of my bed.
Gosh, can't আপনি come through a door, আপনি scared me. I told him.
Sorry, I'm sorry for not listening আপনি today at the beach. Nathen told me.
Yeah me too. I ব্যক্ত as I was walking to my bathroom.
I changed into my pajamas and brushed my teeth then went to get on my bed.
I'm sorry I freaked out the other day. I said.
Its okay, its not your fault I started it and আপনি shouldn't feel like we have to protect আপনি all the time, আপনি are a big girl. He said.
How can I stay mad at you?. I said.
আপনি can't, to anyone either. Nathen said.
I know. I ব্যক্ত as I crawled on my বিছানা to him.
He kissed me on the lips and then I layed down and he layed beside me.
One question, I said. Why didn't আপনি answer my call?
I was mad at আপনি for freaking out and then yelling at running away from me on the interstate. He told me.
I'm soo sorry I told him.
Me too. প্রণয় you. He said.
প্রণয় আপনি too, goodnight. I said.
goodnight. He ব্যক্ত
Hey, Its Addi.
I'm sorry for frreaking out on আপনি and I'm sorry that, I just didn't know what to do. Thanks for looking out for me, your the best.
I hung up and waited for his call back. I went to get something good to eat and to drink and then went and take a shower. it felt good to take a hot shower. It was getting late and I still hadn't heard from Nathen yet. I was getting worried, so I called him again.
নমস্কার its me again. I started off with.
I just wanted to see what আপনি were doing and that I'm really really sorry about the past few days amd that um im just sorry. Please call and let me know that your okay অথবা নিরাপদ অথবা just to talk please. I ব্যক্ত bye and then hung the phone up.
I went to school the following morning and Nathen wasn't anywhere at school. After lunch I decided to skip the rest of the দিন and see if I could find Nathen. I went to Jacobs house and ask if he had heard অথবা seen Nathen. he ব্যক্ত no but he was going to turn all wolfy and ask the other guys.
He came back with 5 মিনিট and he ব্যক্ত that none of them had seen অথবা heard from him. I ব্যক্ত thanks and bye and the left. I got really scared I drove around town and then I went to sit দ্বারা the beach. I notice that a bunch of guys were jumping off the cliff, it looked really fun. I drove up to the শীর্ষ of the cliff and went and stood not that close to the edge. I was sorta afraid of heights. I hadn't been in the water sinse Max had came and rescued me. I sat on the edge of the cliff and just started thinking. I thought about Nathen and if he was okay and why I just didn't jump off the cliff like the other guys did. I stood up careful and then all of the sudden the cliff broke right under me. I started falling, I remember in my Coast Guard training that আপনি never want to fall to your side অথবা back অথবা butt, আপনি want to fall like standing straight up. I tried to get in a standing straight but I couldn't I was falling to my shoulder, I hit the water hard harder than when the vamp let me fall to the ground the other day. Once I reserfaced to the শীর্ষ of the water I noticed people standing on the beach. I started swimming to the কূল and got there pretty quickly. Once I got there I had people asking me if I was ok and I told them yes. I started walking back to my motorcycle when I saw Nathen walking the oppisite dirrection from the cliff.
Nathen. I yelled. He didn't stop he kept walking.
Nathen I secreamed louder. No answer. I started crying a little bit he was really mad at me. Nathen I ব্যক্ত in a wisper and then I yelled Nathen as loud as I could crying it wasn't loud enough for someone that far off to hear but I knew he heard it and all the other calls I yelled.
I stood there drippng wet until he turned around and saw me. Nathen, I ব্যক্ত quietly again. He walked over not a নমস্কার অথবা anything he just ব্যক্ত What.
Luckly no one was around now.
No one is getting older except me and I... I trailed off hoping that he would understand what I was saying.
Okay, sorry আপনি are all wet. Nathen ব্যক্ত as he turned around and started walking again.
I started running after him and said;
This is why I don't open up easily to anyone, because stupid guys like আপনি come and like me and then they shut me out of their lives and it creates a bottomless pit and its hard to fill it back up. I said/ yelled.
Nathen kept walking and I stood there for a really long time. When I finally collected all my thoughts Jacob was standing beside me.
how long have আপনি been here? I ask.
Few minutes. Jacob said.
Oh, I was just looking at the pretty woods. I told him.
I don't think so. He said.
Tears started forming in my eyes again. I ব্যক্ত I was sorry, I know he is mad but I have told him sorry a lot and I don't know what else to do. I said.
Its ok he will come around.. Jacob said.
Jacob pulled me into a hug, I couldn't help the tears now, they were pouring dwon my face. I didn't know what to say. I just stood there in Jacobs arms.
I tried to explain to him why I didn't let him in so fast, but he didn't listen to me. I told Jacob.
It will be okay Addi. He said.
আপনি must be cold, Jacob ব্যক্ত he gave me his সোয়েটার that he was wearing.
Thanks I said.
Lets get আপনি home. Jaocb said.
He gave me a piggy back ride up to my motorcycle and then he got on and then I got on and he drove me home. When I got প্রথমপাতা it was dark and I went straight upstairs to get into the shower. Once I got out Jacob was still downstairs playing with Nessie and I went to find Alice.
নমস্কার Alice. I said.
নমস্কার Addi, I heard what happened. Im sorry. Alice told me.
Yeah me too. I told her.
ITs gonna be fine though. She said.
Hope so, Why have I always went for a wolf? I ask jokingly.
I don't know Addi. Alice said.
Thanks for looking out for me. I said.
No problem. She said. I don't mind at all.
Well I'm goning to bed, goodnight, প্রণয় you. I said.
goodnight, প্রণয় আপনি too. Alice said.
I walked into the living room and told everyone goodnight and I told Jacob thanks. Renesme gave me a hug before I went upstairs and she showed me Nathen was in my room, but I took it as she has seen him in there before.
I went upstairs and open my door and Nathen was sitting on the edge of my bed.
Gosh, can't আপনি come through a door, আপনি scared me. I told him.
Sorry, I'm sorry for not listening আপনি today at the beach. Nathen told me.
Yeah me too. I ব্যক্ত as I was walking to my bathroom.
I changed into my pajamas and brushed my teeth then went to get on my bed.
I'm sorry I freaked out the other day. I said.
Its okay, its not your fault I started it and আপনি shouldn't feel like we have to protect আপনি all the time, আপনি are a big girl. He said.
How can I stay mad at you?. I said.
আপনি can't, to anyone either. Nathen said.
I know. I ব্যক্ত as I crawled on my বিছানা to him.
He kissed me on the lips and then I layed down and he layed beside me.
One question, I said. Why didn't আপনি answer my call?
I was mad at আপনি for freaking out and then yelling at running away from me on the interstate. He told me.
I'm soo sorry I told him.
Me too. প্রণয় you. He said.
প্রণয় আপনি too, goodnight. I said.
goodnight. He ব্যক্ত
Preface
I had done it, all of it.
All of which I never wanted to do.
I had hurt her.
I had risked her life....again....
I had made her suffer.
I had caused her enough pain to last an eternity.
And here I was, getting ready to do give here more pain, getting ready to do what I always wanted and never wanted to do.
I took a deep breath, and the scent of her blood burned my throat like white hot knifes, though I did not have any urge to drink it.
Yes….This just proves it, I am a monster. How could I even think about my thirst when she was suffering because of me?
Because of me…yes, it’s entirely my fault.
I ignored the throbbing in my throat and injected the venom straight into her heart...the হৃদয় which will stop beating soon, the হৃদয় which was the reason for me to live, the হৃদয় which she had প্রদত্ত to me to keep নিরাপদ just like how I had প্রদত্ত her my silent heart, because of my selfishness, it was going to stop beating.....forever.
I had done it, all of it.
All of which I never wanted to do.
I had hurt her.
I had risked her life....again....
I had made her suffer.
I had caused her enough pain to last an eternity.
And here I was, getting ready to do give here more pain, getting ready to do what I always wanted and never wanted to do.
I took a deep breath, and the scent of her blood burned my throat like white hot knifes, though I did not have any urge to drink it.
Yes….This just proves it, I am a monster. How could I even think about my thirst when she was suffering because of me?
Because of me…yes, it’s entirely my fault.
I ignored the throbbing in my throat and injected the venom straight into her heart...the হৃদয় which will stop beating soon, the হৃদয় which was the reason for me to live, the হৃদয় which she had প্রদত্ত to me to keep নিরাপদ just like how I had প্রদত্ত her my silent heart, because of my selfishness, it was going to stop beating.....forever.
Okay so I was just looking through my pictures, and I found this:
I can't remember where I got it from (possibly edwardandbella.com?) but I just thought it as really interesting.
I mean look how small Alice is, when the book says she's small I didn't think she'd be that much smaller than Bella.
And look how tall Jacob is...hmm maybe he would win in a fight against Edward...maybe not, Edward is good at everything afterall.
So anyway, I just thought it would be useful for people who have trouble picturing the characters heights -like me :).
Tell me what আপনি think- does it help at all??
I can't remember where I got it from (possibly edwardandbella.com?) but I just thought it as really interesting.
I mean look how small Alice is, when the book says she's small I didn't think she'd be that much smaller than Bella.
And look how tall Jacob is...hmm maybe he would win in a fight against Edward...maybe not, Edward is good at everything afterall.
So anyway, I just thought it would be useful for people who have trouble picturing the characters heights -like me :).
Tell me what আপনি think- does it help at all??
Okay so here's a little game that I found. Just like the real bingo, but for when আপনি say one of the মতামত -and you've probably ব্যক্ত one of the মতামত আরো then once lol.
Okay so some of the boxes are a little mean, for example '*ignores Jacobs existence*'. Please don't take offence, I didn't make this. And there are some spelling mistakes too, but I'm sure আপনি can read it.
I just glanced over it then, and I would say I fill about 10 (how come it's so জনপ্রিয় if it's so cr*appy being one I use often-my বন্ধু just don't understand lol). How many do আপনি think আপনি can fill, মতামত below :)
I just thought it was something funny; tell me what আপনি think please.
Okay so some of the boxes are a little mean, for example '*ignores Jacobs existence*'. Please don't take offence, I didn't make this. And there are some spelling mistakes too, but I'm sure আপনি can read it.
I just glanced over it then, and I would say I fill about 10 (how come it's so জনপ্রিয় if it's so cr*appy being one I use often-my বন্ধু just don't understand lol). How many do আপনি think আপনি can fill, মতামত below :)
I just thought it was something funny; tell me what আপনি think please.
So these are, দ্বারা far, my পছন্দ উদ্ধৃতি from the first 3 books. (I haven't read breaking dawn yet :P)
1.If seth didn't cut it out, I was going to throw a pinecone at him.-Bella (I just think that's hilarious.)
2.Your hair looks like a haystack. But I like it. -Edward
3.I প্রণয় you. I want you. Right now. -Edward.
4.Marry me first. -Edward
5.I'll never forgive myself for leaving you.-Edward
6.Does my being half naked bother you? -Jacob
I can't think of any more... But feel free to add on XD
1.If seth didn't cut it out, I was going to throw a pinecone at him.-Bella (I just think that's hilarious.)
2.Your hair looks like a haystack. But I like it. -Edward
3.I প্রণয় you. I want you. Right now. -Edward.
4.Marry me first. -Edward
5.I'll never forgive myself for leaving you.-Edward
6.Does my being half naked bother you? -Jacob
I can't think of any more... But feel free to add on XD