*Prologue before this chapter :)
Holding my breath, I went to first block, History. I threw my bad onto the floor, and fell down into my seat. I quickly pulled my ঘোমটা up, crossed my arms, and tried to be invisible. How come when I was wanting to be seen, I wasn't, yet now when I needed to be invisible, it seemed like I had a giant neon sign pointed at me, shouting "Look at me! It's all my fault!"
Mr. Thorson started attendance, and I wished my name was magically erased from his checklist.
"Essence," he said, bored.
"Here," I whispered in the dead silence. All eyes turned on me. Mr. Thorson nearly choked, and looked up at me, with terrified eyes. He too was surprised I'd had the guts to come to school again. Actually, I don't have any courage; Mom wouldn't let me transfer... to another state.
"Um... It's... It's good to see you, Essence," he ব্যক্ত slowly. I pursed my lips, and put my head on my desk, trying to shake the feeling of everyone's eyes off of me. Mr. Thorson cleared his throat, and began the lesson about the Romans.
***
"Essence! Essence!! Stop!!" they shouted. But it was too late. I saw the beam of light; was I dead already? Huh. That wasn't bad at all. I didn't even feel a thing! But then I felt tearing at my skin, and the wetness of blood. Oh no. No, no, no.
"Essence," Mr. Thorson said. My eyes snapped open, and I gasped. My hands, which had my nails dug into my face, slowly moved to my neck, which was uncut and dry. But still, I felt the pain, like someone had taken a saw and was carving into me even though I was awake. Awake, and still in my history classroom. "Essence, class is over," Mr. Thorson said. "You'd better get going." I let out a deep breath, and then sucked in what courage I had left.
"Sorry," I whispered. I stood up and grabbed my bag, heading for the door. Mr. Thorson cleared his throat.
"How're আপনি doing, Essence?" he asked, concerned. I stopped and turned to face him.
"I... I'm fine," I managed to choke out. But as I spoke, my eyes flooded, and I left before he saw them spill over. I was nowhere near fine. Each step I took, I felt an electrical shock run through my legs, only to have the numb feeling return to me সেকেন্ড later, reminding me of everything that had happened. Was it really only two weeks ago? It felt like I'd been living with this for centuries, but yet the pain still felt brand new.
Will it never end?
Holding my breath, I went to first block, History. I threw my bad onto the floor, and fell down into my seat. I quickly pulled my ঘোমটা up, crossed my arms, and tried to be invisible. How come when I was wanting to be seen, I wasn't, yet now when I needed to be invisible, it seemed like I had a giant neon sign pointed at me, shouting "Look at me! It's all my fault!"
Mr. Thorson started attendance, and I wished my name was magically erased from his checklist.
"Essence," he said, bored.
"Here," I whispered in the dead silence. All eyes turned on me. Mr. Thorson nearly choked, and looked up at me, with terrified eyes. He too was surprised I'd had the guts to come to school again. Actually, I don't have any courage; Mom wouldn't let me transfer... to another state.
"Um... It's... It's good to see you, Essence," he ব্যক্ত slowly. I pursed my lips, and put my head on my desk, trying to shake the feeling of everyone's eyes off of me. Mr. Thorson cleared his throat, and began the lesson about the Romans.
***
"Essence! Essence!! Stop!!" they shouted. But it was too late. I saw the beam of light; was I dead already? Huh. That wasn't bad at all. I didn't even feel a thing! But then I felt tearing at my skin, and the wetness of blood. Oh no. No, no, no.
"Essence," Mr. Thorson said. My eyes snapped open, and I gasped. My hands, which had my nails dug into my face, slowly moved to my neck, which was uncut and dry. But still, I felt the pain, like someone had taken a saw and was carving into me even though I was awake. Awake, and still in my history classroom. "Essence, class is over," Mr. Thorson said. "You'd better get going." I let out a deep breath, and then sucked in what courage I had left.
"Sorry," I whispered. I stood up and grabbed my bag, heading for the door. Mr. Thorson cleared his throat.
"How're আপনি doing, Essence?" he asked, concerned. I stopped and turned to face him.
"I... I'm fine," I managed to choke out. But as I spoke, my eyes flooded, and I left before he saw them spill over. I was nowhere near fine. Each step I took, I felt an electrical shock run through my legs, only to have the numb feeling return to me সেকেন্ড later, reminding me of everything that had happened. Was it really only two weeks ago? It felt like I'd been living with this for centuries, but yet the pain still felt brand new.
Will it never end?