Edward & Alice Club
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posted by AliceHaleCullen
10. Take her credit cards and shopping vouchers, hold them above your head and tell her to “jump for it”.

9. Tell her if she was just a few centimetres shorter she could legally be a midget.

8. Wear the trashiest possible clothing whenever আপনি can.

7. Tie her up in a straightjacket. When she protests, tell her she needs to go back to the loony bin.

6. When আপনি go into the sun with her, fall into a twitching heap on the ground and moan “I’m melting.”

5. Pelt her with cloves of garlic.

4. When she gets a vision, ask if her “spidey senses” are tingling.

3. Trip her up and ask if she saw it coming.

2. Ask her what আপনি will be doing in five মিনিট every ten minutes.

And the Number One way to annoy Alice Cullen?

1. যন্ত্রপত্র her dozens of application forms for the position of speaker on psychic hotlines.
posted by AliceHaleCullen
10. Sing “Discovery Channel” দ্বারা the Bloodhound Gang in your head whenever he is near.

9. Hotwire his Volvo and take it on a joyride.

8. Tell him the relationship he is having with Bella is practically paedophilia and he could be sent to jail for it.

7. Ask how Tanya is.

6. End every argument with “Bite me, Edward.”

5. Call him Romeo both behind his back and to his face.

4. Whenever he complains অথবা argues, reply with “What are আপনি gonna do Edward? Go to Italy?”

3. Tell him his hair isn’t bronze, it’s ginger, and he should stop denying himself – he’s a ranga.

2. Whenever he leaves a room অথবা says goodbye, get down on your knees and beg him not to go, not again.

And the Number One way to annoy Edward Cullen?

1. Take his silver cell phone and change the ringtone to “Like a Virgin” দ্বারা Madonna.