Richard Hammond প্রবন্ধ | Original প্রবন্ধ on ফ্যানপপ

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posted by MissD416

My fellow Hamtards, I think I've gone bonkers.

One night, two weeks পূর্বে I had a dream that is stuck in my memory like a tattoo and it goes like this:

I had just walked in the door to my house and I went into my room to get changed out of my uniform and when I come out, Jeremy Clarkson is in my dining room and on the phone to someone. দ্বারা now I'm confused and I go down to ask what's going on here, but then my dog barks at some cars parked outside. There's a knock at the door and when I open it, James May walks through and starts talking to Clarkson, then Richard Hammond walks in and smiles and...

A strange crush...

posted by Hamsterlovemore

Richard Hammond, আপনি are a bloody হৃদয় breaker. I have a crush on you, bigger, it seems, than anybody else's. শীর্ষ Gear, Blast Lab (despite it being rather boring), anything, if you're on it, I'll watch it. The way আপনি have such enthusiasm for everything, the way আপনি explode into a fit of physics, the way your caravans explode into a fit of burning plastic, it makes me smile. If আপনি came up to me, the first thing I'd do is run your wife down with your Harley (best dream EVER), hold আপনি close, and চুম্বন আপনি within an inch of your life. Then I'd treat আপনি to a rubbish and soppy film at the Odeon, share ভুট্টার খই with you, then take আপনি to, I dunno, Giraffe, order a টেবিল দ্বারা the window, and declare my undying প্রণয় for you. And tell your wife to rest in peace. Kinda. Then I'd take আপনি home, চুম্বন আপনি আরো and take it from there...

This was all dreamed up in maths, and it cost me a detention, but hey, half-feeling your lips was great! প্রণয় আপনি Hamster!