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posted by bigmanguy
It usually takes me a couple of years to complete an album because I'm such a perfectionist; so Frank thinks I should start working on it as soon as possible. He agreed that I should have from October to January off because I've been working so much lately and I feel bad because I haven't been able to spend a whole lot of time with Christian.

Today's the first দিন of my vacation and it's going to take me a while to get back into the routine of taking care of Christian completely on my own every day. I woke up around 9 o'clock in the morning because I knew Christian would be awake any মিনিট now. I walked into the room just as he was opening his eyes and ব্যক্ত "good morning buddy!" I think he was surprised that I was there because he asked "you're not going to work daddy?" I ব্যক্ত "not for three months."

I picked him up and brought him downstairs. I put him down on the ground and noticed something taped to the refrigerator. I put the দুধ on the counter and grabbed the piece of paper off of the fridge to see what it was. I knelt down পরবর্তি to Christian and asked "what's this?" He ব্যক্ত "those are my stickers to প্রদর্শনী আপনি how many times I used the potty daddy. The red stars are the accidents and the yellow stars are the good ones." I asked "how come আপনি haven't showed me this before buddy?" He ব্যক্ত "I want to; but আপনি are tired." I felt really guilty as I looked down at him and I ব্যক্ত "I don't want আপনি to ever feel like আপনি can't প্রদর্শনী me something just because I've had a long দিন at work buddy! I don't care how tired I am; আপনি can spend time with me."

I looked at the piece of paper and noticed that there were significantly আরো yellow stars with about 10 red stars scattered throughout the page. I ব্যক্ত "it's definitely getting better. I wish some of those red stars weren't there; but it's getting better! We'll work on it while I'm on vacation. You're still having quite a bit of accidents huh buddy?" He ব্যক্ত "yeah; I'm sorry daddy" and started crying.

I picked him up and ব্যক্ত "it's okay Christian; why are আপনি so upset? It's no big deal; আপনি know I don't care about that stuff!" He ব্যক্ত "but daddy; I don't want আপনি to be mad! I want to make আপনি happy! I didn't do good!" I don't have any idea why Christian is so critical of himself; but it makes me feel horrible!" I grabbed the piece of paper and asked "do আপনি see this? This is so good Christian! Why would আপনি think that I would be mad at you? I'm happy buddy; trust me! We just need to work on it a little bit আরো until there's no red stars!" He ব্যক্ত "you're supposed to be mad at me; aren't you?" I ব্যক্ত "of course not" and hugged him as tight as I possibly could!

***

I'm a daddy on a mission this week and my mission is to hopefully complete this potty training thing with Christian. He is almost completely trained and I can't wait to put this thing behind us because I'm running out of carpet cleaner.

Christian came downstairs after waking up this morning and walked up to me as I stood at the counter drinking my coffee. I knelt down and gave him a hug as I ব্যক্ত "good morning buddy; did আপনি sleep well?" He shook his head yes and I asked "did আপনি already use the bathroom?" He ব্যক্ত "yup" and was about to sit at the টেবিল when I ব্যক্ত "I'm making breakfast sandwiches instead of just cereal; so when they're finished cooking I will bring one in to আপনি and the two of us can eat in the living room while we watch cartoons."

After the egg and cheese breakfast sandwiches were finished cooking, I came into the living room with them on a plate. I sat down পরবর্তি to Christian on the পালঙ্ক and passed Christian his sandwich. I definitely think Christian likes the idea of having me প্রথমপাতা for three months because I think he was getting sick of eating cereal every morning.

Christian had ketchup on his face; so I leaned over to wash it with a napkin and that's when I realized the পালঙ্ক was soaking wet. I looked at Christian and he ব্যক্ত "I think I need to go potty daddy." I rolled my eyes and ব্যক্ত "I think আপনি already did." I joked "why did আপনি have to pee on my couch?" I think Christian thought I was mad because he burst out crying.

After cleaning him and the পালঙ্ক up, he was still crying and I asked "what's wrong Christian?" He ব্যক্ত in between sobs "I made আপনি mad!!!" I picked him up and ব্যক্ত "I'm not mad at আপনি at all Christian; daddy was joking!" He insisted "you're supposed to be mad at me daddy!" I hugged him and ব্যক্ত "no I'm not supposed to be mad at you! Do I look mad?" He ব্যক্ত "no; but why aren't আপনি mad at me?" I ব্যক্ত "because I would never get mad at আপনি for anything! I might get disappointed in আপনি sometimes; but I'll never be mad at you! I thought আপনি went to the bathroom already though." He ব্যক্ত "I was going to when I came down here; but then আপনি ব্যক্ত that I could watch কার্টুন and I kind of forgot." I ব্যক্ত "well; I'm not too happy that আপনি lied to me Christian. It would've been better if আপনি just ব্যক্ত আপনি had to go. It would've taken just a few মিনিট and then আপনি could have come in here to watch cartoons. Doesn't that make a lot আরো sense than going through all of this?" I think he started to get what I was saying because he gave me a hug and a kiss.

***

I excitedly shouted "high five Christian!" He looked at the chart taped to the fridge and gave me a high-five. I ব্যক্ত "I think it's pretty নিরাপদ to say that আপনি are officially potty trained now buddy! আপনি haven't had an accident in a week; not even at night and that shocks me. I'm so proud of আপনি buddy!" He jumped into my arms and was way আরো concerned about the bag of ক্যান্ডি চকোলেট on the counter than what I had to say.

I passed him some M&Ms and we went into the living room to play with his toys. I usually keep the TV on and a হ্যালোইন commercial came on. I wasn't surprised that they were using "Thriller" as the সঙ্গীত on the advertisement because that song has become sort of a হ্যালোইন tradition. Christian looked up at the TV and I asked "would আপনি like to go trick-or-treating this বছর like the kids on TV?" He ব্যক্ত "get ক্যান্ডি চকোলেট daddy!" I chuckled and ব্যক্ত "yeah; people will give আপনি candy!" He ব্যক্ত "okay" and I was kind of regretting bringing up the idea of trick-or-treating because I just realized that I have no choice other than to disassociate myself from the Jehovah's Witness religion. Sometimes I wish the rules weren't so strict because I want Christian to experience holidays just like any other child. I hope mother won't be too mad at me!

***

Yesterday my paperwork was approved and I've been officially disassociated from the Jehovah's Witness religion. My mother's on the way over and I don't know how she's going to take the news. The worst part is that Christian is taking a nap; so I can't use his cuteness as a distraction from our conversation.

Once she arrived, the two of us sat down in the living room and she asked "what did আপনি want to talk about Michael?" I asked "can I ask আপনি a hypothetical question?" She ব্যক্ত "yeah; I guess." I asked "what would আপনি think if I told আপনি that I disassociated myself from the Jehovah Witnesses?" She sat there silently for a few মিনিট and then she asked "this isn't a hypothetical question; is it Michael?" I let out a deep sigh and ব্যক্ত "no; it's not mother." She looked up at me and whispered "why?" I ব্যক্ত "I'm not trying to hurt আপনি mother because I know how important me being a Jehovah's Witness is to you; but I want Christian to experience the things that I never got to growing up!" She ব্যক্ত "Michael; you're my only good son! I প্রণয় my children equally of course; but you're the only one that ever listens to me anymore! All the others got sucked into the world of greed and I think any hope of getting them back is long gone now! I understand why আপনি did what আপনি did and I accept it; but আপনি should know that I'll never agree with it!"

She got off of the পালঙ্ক and walked into the kitchen. I followed after her as she opened the front door and I shouted "mother; wait! I'm not trying to hurt you!" She didn't seem mad at me which was a good thing I guess; but I think it definitely saddens her to have me abandon one of the things that the two of us shared over the years.

I ran upstairs to my room and sat on my বিছানা as I started to cry. I always try to make others happy instead of myself and I felt like I had to choose between Christian and my mother. I could either make my mother happy দ্বারা practicing that religion অথবা make my son happy দ্বারা letting him experience things like Halloween, Christmas, and Thanksgiving. Part of being a father is putting my son first before anyone else. I'm hoping all this will pay off in the end because right now I feel like the world's worst son.

Suddenly, I noticed Christian climbing onto my বিছানা and he asked "why আপনি cry daddy?" I tried my best to dry my tears before he saw me crying; but it was already too late for that. I ব্যক্ত "I'm just a little said; that's all." He ব্যক্ত "you need a hug daddy" and wrapped his arms around me. I smiled and ব্যক্ত "thank you; I think that's exactly what I needed buddy." He ব্যক্ত "don't cry anymore!" I chuckled and ব্যক্ত "okay; I won't!"

***

Christians surprised me when he ব্যক্ত he didn't want to be Mickey মাউস for his first হ্যালোইন and I'm starting to think that he just wants the ক্যান্ডি চকোলেট আরো than the whole experience of trick-or-treating. I think he finally settled on being a doctor after changing his mind over and over again. I hope he's okay with that because I just bought the costume and I have a feeling he's going to look so adorable. I got the costume just in time because হ্যালোইন is today. I came up with the idea of buying myself a costume as a disguise; so I can go trick-or-treating without a giant mob of অনুরাগী knowing that I'm even near them.

I was in the living room opening up the costumes when Christian came in and noticed them. He asked "is that my doctor costume?" I ব্যক্ত "it sure is buddy!" He asked "what are আপনি going to be daddy?" I ব্যক্ত "I'm going to be Spiderman because that's the only thing with a mask that will cover my whole head." I helped him put his costume on and he looked so cute. The white জ্যাকেট was way too big for him and his hands pretty much got হারিয়ে গেছে inside the sleeves. I think his পছন্দ part of the costume was the stethoscope and I think he thought it was real because he kept trying to check my হৃদয় beat.

After I got my costume on, we went outside and Tim dropped us off in the middle of town. I told him to pick us up in about 45 মিনিট because I figure any longer would be too long for Christian; since he just turned three a few weeks ago.

Christian was having a blast knocking on the doors. I was always trying to get him to ask for the candy; but he's way too shy for that. He didn't even really want to take the ক্যান্ডি চকোলেট because he was too afraid. He would only take it if I took it from the bowl first and he took him from me.

I looked down at my watch and realized that Tim would be looking for us in a few minutes; so I ব্যক্ত "this is going to be the last house Christian because we have to go home." We walked up to the door with Christian holding my hand and the doorknob turned. The door swung open and a teenager wearing a নেকড়ে mask with a flannel শার্ট growled at Christian.

Christian immediately freaked out and started hysterically crying as he clung to my arm. I picked him up and looked at this teenage boy as I asked with an irritated tone "seriously? That was so immature of আপনি to scare a three-year-old! I'm glad আপনি think that's so funny dude because I don't at all!"

I carried Christian off of the property and back to the SUV where Tim was. I climbed into the car with him on my lap as he continued to cry. I ব্যক্ত "it's okay buddy; I know that boy was mean! He ব্যক্ত "daddy; we go home!" I ব্যক্ত "yup; we're going প্রথমপাতা right now!" He seemed all shaken up because of what had just happened; so I excitedly asked "do আপনি want me to make চকোলেট chip প্যানকেকস for dinner?" His eyes widened and I chuckled as I ব্যক্ত "I thought আপনি would like the sound of that!"

দ্বারা the time we got back to the ranch, it was almost 7 o'clock at night and we usually eat ডিনার at 5; so I wasn't surprised to see that Christian was getting tired. He was practically falling asleep at the টেবিল while he was eating his pancakes. I sat down পরবর্তি to him and fed him bites from his plate as he struggled to keep his eyes open.

After he had eaten most of the খাবার I picked him up and whispered "are আপনি ready to go night – night Christian?" I patted his back as I carried him upstairs and got him ready for bed. I brought him into his room and put him under the covers. I thought he was almost asleep at this point; but when I leaned in to give him a kiss, his eyes shot open and he asked "are আপনি eating my ক্যান্ডি চকোলেট daddy? আপনি smell like skittles!" I ব্যক্ত with a guilty grin on my face "maybe!" He ব্যক্ত "you are; I can see the red on your teeth and your tongue is purple!" I giggled and ব্যক্ত "alright; আপনি caught me! There's plenty আরো left; so I snuck a couple pieces!" He lightly pecked my lips and ব্যক্ত "don't eat all of my ক্যান্ডি চকোলেট daddy!" I chuckled as I shut off the light and turned the TV on. Christian ব্যক্ত "I প্রণয় আপনি আরো daddy!" I laughed as I ব্যক্ত "hey; I'm supposed to say that! I প্রণয় আপনি আরো Christian!"

***

It was weird being able to celebrate হ্যালোইন because I've never been allowed celebrate it before and now I have to figure out how to celebrate Thanksgiving because that's right around the corner. My mother still won't talk to me ever since she found out that I left the Jehovah's Witness religion and I don't know if she's mad at me অথবা not. I wish I could convince her to leave the religion as well; because I want her to be able to be a part of all these new experiences with us.

I was sitting at the রান্নাঘর টেবিল waiting for Christian to wake up and there was a knock at the door. I got up to answer it and my manager Frank was standing there. I invited him inside and he ব্যক্ত "I just wanted to stop in and see how you're doing; and I haven't seen আপনি in about a month. How are আপনি enjoying your vacation?" I ব্যক্ত "I finally disassociated myself from the Jehovah's Witnesses and now I'm just trying to figure out how to celebrate Thanksgiving. I'm thinking I should invite as many people as possible over to the house for Thanksgiving." He ব্যক্ত "I'll definitely come Michael! I usually celebrate Thanksgiving with my family; but if আপনি want me to I can come!" I ব্যক্ত "only if আপনি want to Frank and if it's okay with your family. I really think আপনি should celebrate with them instead Frank because they are your family; not me and Christian!" He ব্যক্ত "I consider আপনি part of my family Michael; আপনি know that!" I ব্যক্ত "yeah; but আপনি don't feel the same way about Christian!" He ব্যক্ত "I'll be the first to admit that I wasn't too keen on the idea of আপনি becoming a father; but I'm slowly getting used to it as time passes." I ব্যক্ত "Christian is going to wake up soon; so আপনি should probably go. Feel free to stop দ্বারা on Thanksgiving দিন for a couple of hours; but আপনি really should spend it with your family Frank!" He patted my shoulder and ব্যক্ত "will do for sure!" He shut the door behind him and I walked upstairs to check on Christian to see if he was awake yet.

I walked into his room and he was once again hanging off the side of the bed. I ran to catch him before he fell off the বিছানা and smacked his head on the floor. I picked him up and ব্যক্ত "good morning Christian." He opened his eyes and rubbed them as he ব্যক্ত "good morning daddy." I ব্যক্ত "I'm going to make আপনি some breakfast and while আপনি eat, I'm going to make some phone calls to invite your aunts and uncles to come over on Thanksgiving."

I went downstairs and made Christian some oatmeal for breakfast. Afterwards, I went into the living room and started to call each one of my siblings. Surprisingly, all of them agreed to come over and I'm hoping it's not because my brothers want to ask me for money to pay for another one of their "get rich quick" schemes. I really hope I don't regret inviting them because it usually doesn't end very well for me!

***

My alarm clock started beeping and I opened my eyes just as the sun started to come up. I got ready for the দিন and went downstairs to make myself a cup of coffee. I went to the pantry and grabbed a bunch of different খাবার to start preparing for our Thanksgiving meal this afternoon. I am a pretty good cook; but I've never tried to make some of these foods before and I hope I don't screw it up. I was at a complete loss about how to cook a turkey and this was one of those times when I wish I could call my mother for advice.

I know that that's going to take the longest to cook, so I put that in first and hoped for the best. I decided that it's probably best if I cook the things that I'm most familiar with first; so I made the mashed potatoes and vegetables before starting the আরো difficult things. I'm not really familiar with baking things; I just hope that these pies turn out okay.

After I had gotten the three pies into the oven, I heard Christian coming downstairs. He walked up to me and I ব্যক্ত "hey buddy; I've got to pick out your clothes for the day!" I turned the TV on in the living room and went upstairs to get his clothes while he watched cartoons.

I came back downstairs and helped him get dressed into his little Thanksgiving দিন outfit. It was a pair of খাকি pants, white socks, and a long sleeve white T-shirt, and a sweater vest with a checkered pattern of brown and orange. I combed his hair because I want him to look good when everybody came over.

I only allowed Christian to eat small snacks because I didn't want him to lose his appetite দ্বারা the time everyone arrived. When they got here, I invited them inside and we all hurried to set the টেবিল because they were really hungry. I helped Christian get up into his booster আসন and sat down in the chair পরবর্তি to him. I ব্যক্ত "I guess I'll say grace as fast as possible because I know we all want to eat. A lot has changed in these past couple of months for me and I never thought I would be in this position; but I don't regret it one bit because I প্রণয় my son so much. I'm so thankful that God brought Christian into my life because I can't even imagine what my life would be like without him; amen."

I started to fill Christian’s plate with খাবার and Latoya ব্যক্ত "that was really sweet Michael! I have to say that you're an amazing father!" Jackie ব্যক্ত "yeah Mike; she's right! You're a great dad!" I looked at Christian and asked "do আপনি think they're right?" He ব্যক্ত "you're the best daddy in the whole world!" I hugged him and ব্যক্ত "you're the best son in the whole Christian!"

All of us went into the living room to eat মিষ্টান্ন and we sat on the floor. Christian is addicted to Oreo বিস্কুট and that's his পছন্দ food; so I made an Oreo cookie flavored pie. The মিনিট he started to eat his piece of pie, I could tell that he was going to make a huge mess. I took the plate from him and ব্যক্ত "here; let daddy feed আপনি because I don't want আপনি to make a mess buddy!" Janet ব্যক্ত "you must be excited celebrate বড়দিন with him Michael! আপনি and him get to celebrate your first বড়দিন together! Do আপনি have any plans for বড়দিন Michael?" I ব্যক্ত "I don't really know what I'm going to do yet; but it's kind of irritating that it doesn't snow here in LA! Christian won't get to experience a white Christmas!" She suggested "why don't আপনি take Christian to Canada and rent one of those fancy log cabins; that way there will be snow on the ground when he wakes up on বড়দিন morning?" I ব্যক্ত "actually; that doesn't sound like a bad idea!" Jermaine looked at Christian and asked "what do আপনি want for বড়দিন Christian?" He quietly whispered "clothes." All of us were completely baffled দ্বারা his response and I asked "you really want clothes for Christmas? I can afford to buy আপনি anything আপনি ever want for a toy; but আপনি want clothes?" He ব্যক্ত "I like clothes daddy" and Randy ব্যক্ত "I definitely wasn't expecting to hear him say that! What three-year-old wants clothes for Christmas? My kids just throw any clothes they get behind them and সরানো on to something else!" He joked "can I swap kids with আপনি Mike?" I laughed and ব্যক্ত "sorry; he's here to stay!" Christian ব্যক্ত "kiss daddy" and I puckered my lips as he leaned in to চুম্বন me. Rebbie ব্যক্ত "he's seriously the cutest thing ever Michael!" Christian sat in my lap and I asked "Christian; who is your best friend?" He pointed up at me and Marlon asked "you প্রণয় your daddy; don't আপনি Christian?" He whispered "yeah; I'm daddy's boy!" I ব্যক্ত "and I প্রণয় my buddy so much!"

***

I really like the idea of renting a কেবিন in Canada for a few days and I am going to rent one after all. I was upstairs getting Christian ready to take a nap when I ব্যক্ত "okay buddy; I'm going to go shopping for your বড়দিন presents and Tim is going to watch আপনি while I'm gone!" I turned the TV on and walked out of the room.

My other bodyguard James took me to a department store that was closed just so I could go shopping for the day. I bought so many clothes for Christian that it filled up three shopping carts. After I had gotten a bunch of clothes, I went to the toy section to buy him some fun things. At the back of the store, I saw a huge 300 piece train টেবিল with tracks and Christian has recently developed an interest in "Thomas the Tank Engine"; so I knew he would প্রণয় this.

This wasn't just any train table, it's a $1500 train টেবিল with pretty much every character that is on the "Thomas the Tank Engine" TV প্রদর্শনী and I think the cashier at the store was shocked that I was actually going to spend that much money on one item. I ended up spending $15,000 on all of Christian's বড়দিন presents; but it'll be well worth it when I see his face on বড়দিন morning when he sees all his presents!

***

My bodyguards James and Tim pulled up in front of a huge কেবিন that I had rented in the Canadian countryside. Christian I got out of the car and I ব্যক্ত "have a good holiday আপনি guys; we'll see আপনি when আপনি come to pick us up in three days!" James ব্যক্ত "we already had someone drop off all the gifts আপনি bought and they are in one of the spare bedrooms waiting for আপনি to মোড়ানো them Michael!" I ব্যক্ত "okay guys; thanks for all the help! Say hello to your families for me!" They both ব্যক্ত "we will Michael; have a good Christmas!" I quickly grabbed the cardboard box from the back আসন with all the cookie baking ingredients inside it and waved goodbye to them as they pull out of the driveway.

I carried Christian inside with one hand as I carried the cardboard box with the other. I turned on the light with my elbow because both my hands are full and put the box on the nearby counter. It was way past Christian’s bedtime দ্বারা the time we got to the cabin; so I carried him upstairs to get him ready for bed.

I found a room that was perfect for Christian to sleep in because it had a TV and a big বিছানা that I think would be hard for him to roll out of in the middle of the night. I covered him up with the blankets and kissed his forehead after I turned the TV on. I don't even think he will be awake long enough to even watch one episode of cartoons.

I walked down the hall and found the room where all the presents were. That's when I realized how many presents I had actually bought because this entire room was covered with stuff. I walked into the room and sat down on the small মহাকাশ of the বিছানা that wasn't covered with anything. In one corner of the room, I noticed over 30 rolls I'm wrapping paper and a bucket full of rolls of tape. I whispered to myself "this is going to take forever to মোড়ানো all of this stuff! Why did I wanted do this all of this on my own?" I must've spent most of the night wrapping gifts and when they had all been wrapped I counted about 250 presents. I know what you're thinking; I'm crazy!"

***

I was downstairs cooking বেকন and eggs for breakfast when Christian walked down the stairs of the cabin. He walked up to me and I picked him up as I ব্যক্ত "good morning buddy! Are আপনি ready to have fun today?" He asked "what are we going to do today daddy?" I ব্যক্ত "well, before we do anything we're going to eat breakfast. Then we're going to go outside to play in the snow and go sledding. We're going to decorate the বড়দিন বৃক্ষ and bake বিস্কুট to leave out for Santa Claus. Then we're going to go get ready for বিছানা because tonight's বড়দিন Eve and আপনি have to be asleep for Santa Claus to come."

After we were done eating breakfast, I ব্যক্ত "okay; let's get আপনি ready to go play in the snow!" I went to the closet and grabbed everything we needed. I began to get him dressed in his snowsuit, jacket, gloves, hat, and boots. I looked up at the clock on the দেওয়াল and realized that it had taken me 45 মিনিট to get him ready to go outside. I asked "are আপনি ready to go outside now?" He asked "daddy?" I responded "yeah?" He ব্যক্ত "I have to go potty." I covered my face of my hands and asked "are আপনি serious? Do আপনি really have to go?" He nodded his head yes and I couldn't help but laugh at how much time I had just wasted getting him ready to play in the snow; just to have him tell me that he needed to go to the bathroom before we even made it out the door.

Afterwards, we finally made it outside and it didn't look to me like Christian had ever seen snow before. He wouldn't let go of my hand and I ব্যক্ত "it's okay buddy; it's just snow! It isn't going to hurt you!" He started freaking out and ব্যক্ত "my boot is stuck in the snow daddy!!! I can't move; help!!!" I ব্যক্ত "okay; how about we try something with a little less walking involved?" I climbed onto the sled and put him on my lap. We slid down a huge পাহাড় and thank God I was on the sled with Christian because I had to swerve out of the way so we wouldn't hit a tree. Christian thought স্লেডিং was the best thing in the world after that and I must've carried him up that পাহাড় over 30 times; so we could slide back down!

I brought Christian back inside and fed him some lunch before I put him down for a nap. While he was sleeping, I started to set things up so we could make cookies. An ঘন্টা later, he woke up from his nap and came downstairs. I picked him up and ব্যক্ত "okay; are আপনি ready to make some বিস্কুট for Santa?" The বিস্কুট were already in the চুলা because I knew Christian was far too young to actually help me make the cookies; so it's better just to have him decorate the cookies.

When they came out of the oven, I let them cool down for a few minutes; so they were still warm but not warm enough to burn Christian. I passed Christian a cookie and he put SO MUCH frosting on those বিস্কুট that it was overflowing off the sides. I had to stop him because if I didn't there wouldn't have been enough frosting for the other cookies. After the বিস্কুট were decorated, I asked "do আপনি want to lick the spoon that I used to make the cookie dough with?" He smiled and I passed in the spoon as he walked off into the living room.

I followed after him with boxes of decorations and sat down on the floor. The smell of the pine needles from the বড়দিন বৃক্ষ filled the entire living room as I started to put ornaments and lights on the tree. I made sure to not buy any glass decorations because I wanted Christian to be able to help me decorate the tree. Once that it was decorated, I passed Christian the তারকা and put him on my shoulders. I ব্যক্ত "go ahead; put the তারকা on the শীর্ষ of the বৃক্ষ pal!" Even though he was on my shoulders, he was just barely able to reach high enough to put the তারকা up there!

I took Christian off of my shoulders and noticed that it was starting to get dark; so I ব্যক্ত "let me switch on the lights on the tree." I think that's when Christian really got excited and I ব্যক্ত "okay; let's go eat some macaroni and cheese!"

After he was done eating, we went through his typical bedtime routine and he climbed into বিছানা afterwards. I lie down পরবর্তি to him and read him "the night before Christmas." I kissed his forehead and ব্যক্ত "sleep well buddy! Don't go downstairs until I tell আপনি it's okay! আপনি have to go right to sleep after the প্রদর্শনী is over because if আপনি don't Santa Claus won't come." He ব্যক্ত "okay daddy; I will! I প্রণয় you" I shut off the light and ব্যক্ত "I প্রণয় আপনি more" as I shut the door.

I waited about an ঘন্টা and a half and went to check on Christian to make sure that he was sleeping before I started to bring things downstairs. It took me about 50 trips up and down the stairs to bring everything into the living room. The final trip was for the train টেবিল that I still needed to put together. I tried my best not to make noise as I pushed the gigantic box down the stairs.

I dumped the contents of the box onto the floor as gently as I could; but it still made a racket. I was so worried that that woke Christian up; so I ran upstairs to double check on him again. Once I realized that he was asleep for the rest of the night, I went back downstairs and lay down on my stomach. I opened up the instructions and started to flip through the pages as I ব্যক্ত to myself "Spanish, French, Japanese, German; where the hell is the English version of these instructions?" I found them at the very end of the manual; but that just confused me. It took me from 9 o'clock at night to 3 o'clock in the morning to put together that train table! The box ব্যক্ত "some assembly required" when actually it should have read "all assembly required!” I had to set up the tracks, built the টেবিল itself, and put the trees in the area they were assigned to going দ্বারা the number written on the train table. I'm just glad that I built this thing because I was worried that I wasn't going to be able to figure out how to do it; I'm not a very handy person at all and I'm surprised that I figured out how to put this train টেবিল together all on my own!

***

I heard "daddy, daddy, wake up daddy" as I felt Christian jumping on my chest. I opened up my eyes slightly and groaned in pain as I ব্যক্ত "okay; okay I'm up!" I rubbed my eyes and looked over at the alarm clock as I noticed it was only just barely 7 AM. I got out of বিছানা and chased after Christian as he ran to the শীর্ষ of the stairs. I ব্যক্ত "wait for daddy Christian! Don't go downstairs yet because I want to take pictures.

I grabbed my camera as I followed behind Christian and ব্যক্ত "okay; let's see if Santa Claus came last night" his mouth dropped wide open as he walked in so living room and I snapped pictures with the camera. I knelt down পরবর্তি to Christian and chuckled as I whispered "what is that Christian?" He ব্যক্ত "choo-choo train!" He walked over to the train টেবিল and I knelt down পরবর্তি to him again as I pointed to one of the trains. I quietly asked "who is that Christian?" He looked at it and ব্যক্ত "Thomas!" I gasped and ব্যক্ত "wow; Santa Claus must know that আপনি like Thomas the Tank Engine!"

I grabbed the empty plate of বিস্কুট and ব্যক্ত "wow; he ate all your বিস্কুট buddy!" He didn't even look up from the train টেবিল and that's when I realized it probably would've been a better idea to cover that up with a blanket and have him open it at the very end because I think I হারিয়ে গেছে him.

I sat down on the floor and ব্যক্ত "come here Christian; look at all these presents আপনি have to open?" He whispered "no; I play with my choo-choo train daddy!" I ব্যক্ত "you can play with your choo-choo train later buddy; look at all these presents that daddy spent hours wrapping!" I started to tear open one of the presents and that caught his attention because he took the present out of my hands. Once he realized that there were toys and clothes underneath the wrapping paper, he was unstoppable. He ripped through everything like a tornado and before I knew it, the entire living room floor of the কেবিন was covered with stuff.

Once everything had been opened, Christian started to come up to me and was asking me for help taking things out of the packaging. I ব্যক্ত "I'll open this for আপনি but I want a hug first." He gave me a hug and lightly pecked my lips and I ব্যক্ত "thank you; did আপনি have a good first বড়দিন with me?" He ব্যক্ত "yeah daddy; but how did Santa Claus get that big train টেবিল down the chimney?" I ব্যক্ত "I don't know; Santa is just magical like that I guess!!!”
 Bad is gonna win?
Bad is gonna win?
নমস্কার guys,
After all great picks আপনি made we came to a conclusion:
Bad will face Number Ones,while Thriller faces HIStory.Now the game is on,pick your পছন্দ and let's see who wins.Again,be careful for what আপনি pick.After 13 days these picks expire and winners face at the end.Who is gonna face who?
Bad and Thriller? অথবা HIStory and Number Ones?
Pick as your হৃদয় says,don't be ashamed.If আপনি like Number Ones pick it,no one is gonna know.OH,almost forgot count the সঙ্গীত চলচ্ছবি in too since it's part of an album.
And now,it's time to pick,START PICKING.
Good luck.
 HIStory for earth song?Or Number Ones for Earth song?
HIStory for earth song?Or Number Ones for Earth song?
posted by spiritace
[1st Verse]
Looking Out
Across The Night-Time
The City Winks A Sleepless Eye
Hear Her Voice
Shake My Window
Sweet Seducing Sighs

[2nd Verse]
Get Me Out
Into The Night-Time
Four Walls Won't Hold Me Tonight
If This Town
Is Just An Apple
Then Let Me Take A Bite

[Chorus]
If They Say -
Why, Why, Tell 'Em That Is Human Nature
Why, Why, Does He Do Me That Way
If They Say -
Why, Why, Tell 'Em That Is Human Nature
Why, Why, Does He Do Me That Way

[3rd Verse]
Reaching Out
To Touch A Stranger
Electric Eyes Are Ev'rywhere
See That Girl
She Knows I'm Watching
She Likes The Way I Stare

[Chorus]
If They Say -
Why, Why, Tell 'Em That Is...
continue reading...
posted by Beatit
Don't walk away
See I just can't find the right thing to say
I tried but all my pain gets in the way
Tell me what I have to do so you'll stay
Should I get down on my knees and pray

Chorus 1
And how can I stop losing আপনি
How can I begin to say
When there's nothing left to do but walk away

I close my eyes
Just to try and see আপনি smile one আরো time
But it's been so long now all I do is cry
Can't we find some প্রণয় to take this away
'Cause the pain gets stronger every দিন

Chorus 2
How can I begin again
How am I to understand
When there's nothing left to do but walk away

See now why
All my dreams...
continue reading...
আপনি were there
Before we came
আপনি took the hurt
আপনি took the shame
They built the walls
To block your way
আপনি beat them down
আপনি won the day

It wasn't right
It wasn't fair
আপনি taught them all
আপনি made them care
Yes, আপনি were there
And thanks to you
There's now a door
We all walk through

And we are here
For all to see
To be the best
That we can be
Yes, I am here
'Cause আপনি were there

And we are here
For all to see
To be the best
That we can be
Yes, I am here
'Cause আপনি were there

And we are here
For all to see
To be the best
That we can be
Yes, I am here
'Cause আপনি were there
সঙ্গীত and me

We've been together
For such a long time now
Music, সঙ্গীত and me
Don't care whether all our songs rhyme now
Music, সঙ্গীত and me




Only know wherever I go
We're as close as two বন্ধু can be
There have been others
But never two প্রেমী
Like music, সঙ্গীত and me





Grab a song and come along
আপনি can sing your melody
In your mind আপনি will find
A world of sweet harmony
Birds of a feather
We'll fly together
Now music, সঙ্গীত and me
সঙ্গীত and me


সঙ্গীত and me

We've been together
For such a long time now
Music, সঙ্গীত and me
Don't care whether all our songs rhyme now
Music, সঙ্গীত and me




Only know wherever I go
We're as close as two বন্ধু can be
There have been others
But never two প্রেমী
Like music, সঙ্গীত and me





Grab a song and come along
আপনি can sing your melody
In your mind আপনি will find
A world of sweet harmony
Birds of a feather
We'll fly together
Now music, সঙ্গীত and me
সঙ্গীত and me
posted by Beatit
Money.
Money...
Lie for it
Spy for it
Kill for it
Die for it

So আপনি call it trust
But I say it's just In the devil's game Of greed and lust
They don't care
They'd do me for the money
They don't care
They use me for the money

So আপনি go to church
Read the Holy word
In the scheme of life
It's all absurd
They don't care
They'd kill for the money
Do অথবা dare
The thrill for the money

You're saluting the flag
Your country trusts আপনি
Now you're wearing a badge
You're called the "Just Few"
And you're fighting the wars
A soldier must do
I'll never betray অথবা deceive আপনি my friend but...

If আপনি প্রদর্শনী me...
continue reading...
posted by Beatit
No sense pretending it's over
Hard times just don't go away
You gotta take that chip off your shoulder
It's time আপনি open up, have some faith

Nothing good overcomes easy
All good things come in due time
You gotta have something to believe in
I'm telling আপনি to open your mind

Gotta put your হৃদয় on the line
If আপনি wanna make it right
You've got to reach out and try
Gotta put your হৃদয় on the line
If আপনি wanna get it right
Gotta put it all on the line
You see yourself in the mirror
And আপনি don't like what আপনি see

And things are getting much clearer
Don't আপনি think it's time আপনি go for a change...
continue reading...
posted by Beatit
Ain't the pictures enough, why do আপনি go through so much
To get the story আপনি need, so আপনি can bury me
You've got the people confused, আপনি tell the stories আপনি choose
You try to get me to lose the man I really am
You keep on stalking me, invading my privacy
Won't আপনি just let me be
'Cause your cameras can't control, the minds of those who know
That you'll even sell your soul just to get a story sold

Chorus
I need my privacy, I need my privacy
So paparazzi, get away from me

Some of আপনি still wonder why, one of my বন্ধু had to die
To get a message across, that yet আপনি haven't heard
My friend...
continue reading...
posted by Beatit
Ben, the two of us need look no আরো
We both found what we were looking for
With a friend to call my own
I'll never be alone
And আপনি my friend will see
And you've got a friend in me
(You've got a friend in me)

Ben, you're always running here and there
(Here and there)
আপনি feel you're not wanted anywhere
(Anywhere)
If আপনি ever look behind
And don't like what আপনি find
There's something আপনি should know
You've got a place to go
(You've got a place to go)

I used to say 'I' and 'me'
Now it's 'us' now it's 'we'
(I used to say 'I' and 'me')
(Now it's 'us' now it's 'we')

Ben, most people would turn আপনি away
I don't listen to a word they say
They don't see আপনি as I do
I wish they would try to
I'm sure they'd think again
If they had a friend like Ben
(A friend)
Like Ben
(Like Ben)
Like Ben
Another দিন has gone
I'm still all alone
How could this be
You're not here with me
You never ব্যক্ত goodbye
Someone tell me why
Did আপনি have to go
And leave my world so cold
Everyday I sit and ask myself
How did প্রণয় slip away
Something whispers in my ear and says

That আপনি are not alone
For I am here with আপনি
Though you're far away
I am here to stay
You are not alone
I am here with আপনি
Though we're far apart
You're always in my হৃদয়
You are not alone
All alone
Why, oh

Just the other night
I thought I heard আপনি cry
Asking me to come
And hold আপনি in my arms
I can hear your prayers
Your burdens...
continue reading...
posted by Beatit
This time around
I'll never get bit
Though আপনি really wanna fix me
This time around
you're making me sick
Though আপনি really wanna get me

Somebody's out
Somebody's out to get me
They really wanna fix me, hit me
But this time around
I'm taking no shit
Though আপনি really
wanna get me
You really wanna get me

He really thought
he really had a hold on me
He really thought he really had
They thought they really had control of me
He really thought he really had Control of me
He really thought he really had
They thought they really could control me

This time around
I'll never get bit
Though আপনি really...
continue reading...
When the world is on your shoulder
Gotta straighten up your act and boogie down
If আপনি can't hang with the feelin'
Then there ain't no room for আপনি this part of town
'Cause we're the party people night and day
Livin' crazy that's the only way

So tonight gotta leave that nine to five upon the shelf
And just enjoy yourself
Groove, let the madness in the সঙ্গীত get to you
Life ain't so bad at all
If আপনি live it off the wall
Life ain't so bad at all (live life off the wall)
Live your life off the দেওয়াল (live it off the wall)

You can shout out all আপনি want to
'Cause there ain't no sin in folks all getting loud
If...
continue reading...
Trying to trace Michael Jackson's influence on the pop stars that followed him is like trying to trace the influence of oxygen and gravity. So vast, far-reaching and was his impact — particularly in the wake of Thriller's colossal and heretofore unmatched commercial success — that there weren't a whole lot of artists who weren't trying to mimic some of the Jackson formula.

In a way, such appropriation is fitting. After all, Jackson himself was a borrower. He wasn't content to make a pop record অথবা a dance record. Instead, he wanted everything, combining rock গিটার with R&B rhythms, disco...
continue reading...
posted by Beatit
Yeah Shoo-hee
Oooh
Hee hee!
Shoo-hee
Woh
Woh
Hee!

Love ain't what it used to be
That is what they're tellin' me
Push it in stick it out
That ain't what it's all about

He wanna do something keen to you
He wanna মোড়ানো his arms all around আপনি girl
He wanna shake it up shake it down
Doing it right
He wanna jump back half flap doing it right

He wanna lay আপনি down
Turn it up
Kicking it loose
He wanna fly high nigh high
Baby for you'se

He wanna motormouth
Float around
Baby the back
He wanna shake it up shake it down
Moving round ha ha

Love ain't what it used to be
(Hee!)
That is what they're tellin' me
Push it in stick it out
That...
continue reading...
posted by Beatit
Looking in my mirror
Took me দ্বারা surprise
I can't help but see you
Running often through my mind

Helpless like a baby
Sensual disguise

I can't help but প্রণয় you
It gets better all the time

I can't help it if I wanted to
I wouldn't help it even if I could
I can't help it if I wanted to
I wouldn't help it, no

I can't help it if I wanted to
I wouldn't help it even if I could
I can't help it if I wanted to
I wouldn't help it, no

প্রণয় to run my fingers
Softly while আপনি sigh
প্রণয় came and possessed you
Bringing sparkles to your evey

Like a trip to heaven
Heaven is the prize
I'm so glad I found you
You're an অ্যাঞ্জেল in disguise

I van't help it if I wanted to
I wouldn't help it even if I could
I can't help it if I wanted to
I wouldn't help it, no
At 7:55 a.m., an উশের at the glass doors outside Staples Center in Los Angeles had a message for the thousands already gathering for the day's public memorial for Michael Jackson. "We are aware of your sorrow!" he announced in deep, affectionate tones. "We are aware of your pain! And we are aware of your joy!"

The man in the purple polo শার্ট then instructed ticket-holders how to line up, and that অনুরাগী would have to leave their ফুলেরডালি and other "gifts" on a টেবিল outside the arena, all while insisting that "it is our pleasure, it is our privilege to welcome আপনি ..." It was a moment of genuine...
continue reading...
Once all alone
I was হারিয়ে গেছে in a world of strangers
No one to trust
On my own, I was lonely
আপনি suddenly appeared
It was cloudy before but now it's clear
আপনি took away the fear
আপনি brought me back to life

Chorus
আপনি are the sun
আপনি make me shine
অথবা আরো like the stars
That twinkle at night
আপনি are the moon
That glows in my হৃদয়
You're my daytime my nighttime
My world
You're my life

Now I wake up everyday
With this smile upon my face
No আরো tears, no আরো pain
Cause আপনি প্রণয় me
আপনি help me understand
That প্রণয় is the answer to all that I am
And I'am a better man
আপনি taught me দ্বারা sharing your life

Chorus
আপনি are the sun
আপনি make me shine
অথবা আরো like the stars
That twinkle at night
আপনি are the moon
That glows in my হৃদয়
You're my daytime my nighttime
My world
You're my life

আপনি gave me strength
When I wasn't strong
আপনি gave me hope when all hope is হারিয়ে গেছে
আপনি opened my eyes when I couldn'tšt see
প্রণয় was always here waiting for me
posted by Beatit
Smile, though your হৃদয় is aching
Smile, even though it's breaking
When there are clouds in the sky
You'll get by...
If আপনি smile With your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You'll find that life is still worthwhile if you'll just...

Light up your face with gladness
Hide every trace of sadness
Although a tear may be ever so near
That's the time আপনি must keep on trying
Smile, what's the use of crying
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you'll just...

Smile, though your হৃদয় is aching
Smile, even though it's breaking
When there are clouds in the sky
You'll get by...
If আপনি smile
Through your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you'll just Smile...
That's the time আপনি must keep on trying
Smile, what's the use of crying
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you'll just Smile
posted by Zimbarino
On earth আপনি reached into our souls,
Sung to our hearts
Removed evil from our worlds with your sweet loving nature.

But behind your smile was both happiness and pain.
আপনি carried the pain,
While we, oblivious, গাউন the happiness.

A রশ্মি of sunshine and in a class of your own.
This world ever trying to destroy your light, not worthy of any part of your life.
Yet আপনি never saw it that way and gave us everything till nothing was left.

How could we have placed hatred on someone completely incapable of it.

In heaven now, আপনি have been set free to live eternally where আপনি belong. No pain will reach আপনি up there, of that I’m sure.

আপনি entered this world loved, left loved, and forever will be loved - what happened in between is unforgivable on our part but I pray that প্রথমপাতা at last it can be dealt with.

- আপনি ব্যক্ত আপনি saw the face of God in children, we saw it in you.

R.I.P Michael.
king of pop.
x
Welcome to Hollywood
That's what they told you
A child তারকা in Hollywood
That's what they sold you
Grace with beauty, charm and talent
You would do what আপনি were told
But they robbed আপনি of your childhood
Took your youth and sold it for gold

Elizabeth, I প্রণয় you
You're every তারকা that shines in the world to me
Elizabeth, can't আপনি see that it's true
Elizabeth, I প্রণয় you
You're আরো than just a তারকা to me

Lovely Elizabeth
You have surpassed them all
My friend Elizabeth
Learned to outlast them all
Many started back when আপনি did
Lost their way and now they're gone
But look at you, a true survivor
Full of life and...
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