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Pretty Little Liars S5.07 Review – The Silence of E. Lamb

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Pretty Little Liars S5.07 Review – ‘The Silence of E. Lamb

‘The Silence of E. Lamb’ would have been the definition of boring if it wasn’t for Hanna’s mouth. Rosewood’s It Girl with an Identity Crisis used her lips for kissing Caleb, gulping vodka, leaking secrets and stealing every scene with the best snark. Hanna Marin, ladies and gentlemen, proving silence isn’t golden in Rosewood.

Mona laughs in Emily’s face when she accuses her of putting the rat in Pagie’s locker, not because she wouldn’t get even with Paige, but because it was lame and showed a lack of originality. Who doesn’t love Mona?

Speaking of rats, one is left at the Hastings’ Horrors. Melissa, wanting to succeed in saving her parents’ marriage, is back to talk some sense into her mother and finds the poor dead thing in a trap in the barn. Melissa’s pretty calm for someone handling a rat, and while she’s lacked Mona’s creativity when tormenting the Liars, I really hope she’s not sneaking around tormenting high school girls with dead rodents.

She’s a Hastings. There’s a reason we don’t believe this family would be stupid enough to bury someone they killed in their own backyard! Let’s not ruin that with ridiculous pranks.

Spencer and Aria team up again and it should be cool, but it involves both Ezra, Eddie Lamb and Radley so it’s mainly just boring.

Spencer goes to Ezra’s to help set up his spy goods and trap ‘A’ with surveillance. Ezra tries to redeem himself and says he’s given up on the Ali book and is going to write about his family. Why didn’t he just write about them in the first place!?! The rich family with an ice queen mother has always been the formula for bestseller and would have required a lot less spying on underage girls. Oh, right, it’s because Ezra likes to watch underage girls sleep and have sex with them. I will never be okay with this love story.

Aria is accepted into Radley as a volunteer because Rosewood is filled with inept people in powerful positions because no way does Aria have a passing grade in any class that isn’t taught by Fitz. In the course of one day, she stumbles upon Bethany’s sketch book. Aria also manages to paint Bethany’s ex-roommate as more unstable than she is when Aria upsets the poor girl by producing a picture that Bethany gave to her. The Liars are really awful sometimes, mocking Jenna after they blinded her and tormenting the mentally disturbed.

Do you ever notice Hanna’s always the Liar the other Liars turn to when everyone else wants to bail? After Aria and Spencer opt out of dinner, Em begs Hanna to do her a solid and show up so Mrs. Fields can’t just interrogate Ali.

Nice guys always finish last when Ali’s involved and so 5 seconds after she arrives, Hanna’s left alone with Ali who is upset because Caleb told her she’s a tornado who destroys everything. Caleb’s not wrong, but Ali tells Hanna to drop him because they can’t trust Caleb. Listen, I have some issues with Caleb’s behavior too lately, but he’s not the one who let Hanna

for years! Hanna is pissed and turns to her new BFF, vodka.

Hanna probably would have spent the dinner rolling her eyes at Ali’s pity party even if she hadn’t been drinking, but liquid courage says everything bad that has happened is Ali’s fault. So far, vodka lies a lot less than everyone else in Rosewood.

Emily tries to smooth things over, more for Ali’s feelings than her mom’s, but vodka fueled Hanna refuses to back down because Hanna knows what Hanna means, Emily!

Em scored some points by taking Hanna’s keys, but ended up with nothing when she kicked Hanna out. Friends don’t kick friends out of their homes, Emily. Also, have you forgotten when you were numbing the pain of that shoulder injury with narcotics? Ali’s hurt Hanna worse (and more often), so try to be a little less judgy, okay?

Hanna laughed off Ali’s terror at having to go to the Fields’ for dinner, but Mrs. Fields may be more ninja like than any of the Liars gave her credit for. Not only did she provide a bar with vodka for a dinner party for minors, she didn’t so much as blink when Hanna’s boozing led to some mouthy commentary at the table.

Just like a ninja, she focused in on the true predator at her table: Alison! Drunk Hanna may speak too much, but she speaks the truth, Em’s mom didn’t fall for Ali’s poor me routine at all.

Mrs. Fields’ telling Emily that she doesn’t have to save Alison forever just may be the best parenting that’s ever happened in Rosewood. Here’s hoping Em listens.

After Emily kicks her out, Hanna meets up with Emily’s Swimfan Stalker, who is much nicer than Emily was and offers to share a panni so Hanna can sober up before heading home. Carbs turn into coffee drinks because girls that skinny don’t eat bread and cheese unless they can do 1000 laps in the pool and chatter. Tipsy Hanna is an honest Hanna and she admits the girls can never be friends with Jenna because of what happened in New York. Oh Hanna.

While nothing’s going right for Tipsy Hanna, Sober Hanna has a better night. After the coffee sobers her up, Caleb proves that he just may be there for Hanna if she does indeed lose custody of the Liars in the divorce with Alison when he runs into her and they share a pretty steamy kiss! Haleb fans rejoice and all is right in Hanna nation.

Ezra shows up at Aria’s to tell her that Eddie’s missing and Spencer calls a Liar SOS when the video surveillance equipment catches Ali sneaking around. Emily immediately blames Hanna’s drinking for Ali leaving early, despite the fact that Hanna had already been kicked out and that Ali’s known for sneaking around and keeping secrets from the Liars. Aria’s upset that Hanna’s been drinking, but Spencer knows that Hanna’s really the only one who ever helps her put the pieces together so she’s hoping Hanna will show up despite Emily’s anger.

‘A’ obviously also knows that Hanna’s Spencer’s go to because she texts the Liars about Hanna’s New York slip just as Hanna’s walking in. They immediately kill the love buzz Caleb’s kiss left behind and now they probably need to worry less about ‘A’ and more about Haleb nation taking out a hit on them.

Are the Liars being too hard on Hanna? Did you care about any of the other storylines going on tonight? Head over to the forum and let us know what you think!

By Jenni Tetzlaff on July 22, 2014   /   Reviews   /   Leave a comment

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