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posted by XxLalasaysxX
Here are my তালিকা of corny jokes. Now i'm just gonna let আপনি know now i got alot of these from the ইউটিউব channel, vlogbrothers. So check them out too. Prepare to laugh.
(Make sure your not drinking anything অথবা eating anything আপনি might spit it অথবা something.)

#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.

#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)

#3 Why was the ঝাড়ু late to work?
It overswept!

#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the উপসাগর they'd be bagels.

#5 What's Michelle Obama's পছন্দ vegetable?
Barackoli (broccoli)

#6 Why does the মাশরুম have so many friends?
Because he's a fungi! (Fun guy)

#7 What do আপনি call a fake noodle?
An impasta! (Imposter)

#8 How often do i make chemistry jokes?
Periodically.

#9 What do আপনি call a pencil without lead?
Pointless!

#10 How do আপনি make an octopus giggle ten times?
আপনি give him ten-tickles (tenticles)

#11 How do আপনি make lady gaga cry?
Poker face!

#12 What did Beethoven become when he died?
A decomposer!

#13 What's a chicken's পছন্দ composer?
Bach!

#14 What did one eye say to the other eye?
"Between আপনি and me man, something smells." (Your nose)

#15 What did the stamp say to the envelope?
"Stick with me man, we'll go places."

#16 What did the hat say to the hatrack?
"Stay here, I'll go on a-head."

#17 Why can't আপনি hear a pteradactyl use the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent (the letter p in the name is silent)

#18 Why did the little boy eat his homework?
The teacher ব্যক্ত it was a piece of cake.

#19 Why did the টমেটো blush?
It saw the সালাদ dressing.

#20 What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
"Ruff!" (Rough)

#21 Why did the man send his phone to school?
He wanted a smartphone (i came up with that one too :)

#22 How do crazy people go through a forest?
They take the psycho path.

#23 How do আপনি know if it's raining মার্জার and dogs?
আপনি step in a poodle (puddle)

#24 How do আপনি know if a clock is wise?
It goes clockwise (i thought of that)

#25 How do আপনি get পিকাচু on a bus?
আপনি পোকেমন (pok 'em on)

#26 Why can't আপনি dress with পিকাচু in the room?
He'll পিকাচু (peek at you)

#27 What do আপনি call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese (so old right?)

#28 How do get holy water?
আপনি boil the hell out of it!

#29 What starts with "E" ends with "E" but only has one letter in it?
An envelope, duh xD

#30 Why didn't the skeleton ক্রুশ the road?
He didn't have the guts to.

#31 What did the ghost say to scare the bees?
"BOOOOBEEES!" XD (please don't yell that if your parents are home)

#32 What does an angry pepper do?
It gets jalepeño face! (All up in yo face)

#33 What do আপনি call an alligator in a vest?
An in- vest-igator investigator

#34 What's পরাকাষ্ঠা and fluffy?
পরাকাষ্ঠা fluff
#34.5 what's blue and fluffy? (Think about it)
পরাকাষ্ঠা fluff holding it's breath.

#35 What happens when আপনি drink 7 coca colas?
আপনি burp 7up

#36 Why can't your nose ever be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot.

#37 why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle!

#38 Why was the police man in bed?
He was undercover.

#39 what did one light bulb say to another light bulb?
"Watts up?" (You know li,e the watts that are in a light bulb?)

#40 what did the মাছ say when he hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"
LAST ONE!

#41 Why can't আপনি trust lions?
They be lion to you! (Lying)

Alright so those are my corny jokes. Hope আপনি liked them. Make sure আপনি check out vlogbrothers they're really cool. Ciao! And rememeber...
 PewDiePie
PewDiePie
posted by jessicamc26
A stoner called the আগুন department and said, "Come quick my house is on fire!" The Fireman asked "How do we get there?" The stoner says "DUH, the big red truck!"






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posted by sapherequeen
 :)
:)
I just want to take the time to thank everyone here who has known me, been on my side, is a অনুরাগী of me, cares about me, etc. :)

I appreciate every single person here, and despite my being very moody at times, I will always care for those who feel the same towards me :D

I noticed that I've been very...unpleasant on ফ্যানপপ towards some people, and I apologize for that. All I could say was that I was in the Darkest Time of my life, and it consumed me entirely. But now, that will change >:)

I am me again. I প্রণয় and respect those who have always been there for me, were kind to me, are my fans, and appreciate each and every one of আপনি for the rest of my life :)

I প্রণয় আপনি all! Have a beautiful, wonderful দিন :D
 -LOL!-
-LOL!-
posted by KatiiCullen94
dear Alice.
i don't know why i say alice anymore, i think now i write these emails to myself, to secure me that আপনি were real, that আপনি all were , that he was.
There is evidence that আপনি were here. and was my best friend. But sometimes i dont know wheither i was dreaming অথবা not, But i stop that thought to think again, if it was a dream and আপনি diddnt exist,then how did i know your name, অথবা did i make আপনি up, along with every one else. Maybe i'm going crazy, from without আপনি i dont know. But i want to find out. Do আপনি think a crazy person can be the one to digiosed themselves?? Lets hope for...
continue reading...
posted by twilight0girl
link

Nathan:
Dear Marni,
I am so sorry.
Can আপনি forgive me for this?

Rotti:
Not the debt doctor
With the hungry scalpel!
Here's my prognosis:
Will they live...?

Hench Girls:
Doubtful.

Luigi:
Your the রাস্তা physician
carving flesh sculptures!

Pavi:
Paint your গাধা like rembrandt!
Ha! আপনি Like-a that?!

Rotti:
Better start praying when আপনি see him coming.

Luigi:
cause tonight its curtains!

Luigi, Pavi and Rotti:
Youre the night surgeon!

Chorus:
Remember who আপনি are.

Nathan:
I remember...

Genterns:
Remember what আপনি did to Marni.

Chorus:
Remember who আপনি are.

Nathan:
I remember...

Genterns:
Remember...
continue reading...
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