The Way it’s Always Been

A/N: This is just a little one-shot that’s been in my mind for a while now and I was disappointed how this turned out on the show, so I decided to write this. It’s set directly after episode 2.15 with the whole elevator fiasco. Hope আপনি enjoy.

It had been weeks since she had last seen him, so why was the pain still residing in her chest? Blair could still the whores sitting on his lap while she was the one trying to be nice and throw him a brunch. She had done everything for him, but it still wasn’t good enough. She knew that Chuck was a bastard, but why did she still প্রণয় him?
She wanted to close her eyes and try to erase the memories of him, but of course she couldn’t do that. She was right in the middle of her English class and she still hadn’t heard a word that Ms. Frankel had said. Blair replayed the scene in her mind. The elevator scene. He had come bursting with apologies but it was all a little too late in her mind, but when he had left, she was shocked. She thought that Chuck would at least fight harder for her, but he decided to tuck his tail between his legs and leave without even trying. I guess he showed how much he cared about her.
When the elevator door had closed, she saw the emotions flash across his face, but she had thrown his ফুলেরডালি right back in his face. Where they belonged. And now she hadn’t seen him in about three weeks, well actually she had, in the hallway at school but they always ignored each other. Their relationship was beyond repair. It was better off this way.
She tried to get his image out of her mind, but it was no use. She let the প্রতিমূর্তি of him overflow her senses. Blair always thought that she had been so in প্রণয় with Nate, but it was nothing to what she felt for Chuck. And that scared the hell out of her.
The ঘণ্টা ran, signaling that the দিন had finally come to an end. She quickly gathered her things and ran outside and that’s when she ran তীক্ষ্নভাবে right into Nate.
He grabbed her arm to steady her. “Blair. Are আপনি okay? আপনি don’t look so good.”
Blair looked up into his handsome face and wondered why she had ever gone out with him. He was obviously gorgeous but besides that there wasn’t much there. “Gee. Thanks, Nate.”
He frowned at her sarcastic attitude. “I’m just trying to be your friend. Is this about Chuck again?”
Blair felt contrite instantly. “I’m sorry. I’ve just had a really hard day, that’s all I seem to be having lately.”
“You didn’t answer my question.”
She sighed. She didn’t really want to talk about this, but in a way it might feel good to get it off her chest. “Yes. It’s about Chuck.”
Nate made a face, প্রদর্শিত হচ্ছে his distaste. “Don’t আপনি think it’s time to forget about him, Blair?”
She made a সরানো to continuing walk, but she felt herself rooted to the spot she was in. “Did আপনি just ask me that? Seriously? I thought আপনি were trying to be my friend.”
“I am, Blair.”
She shook her head furiously, throwing her চকোলেট waves all over her shoulders. “A friend would not tell me to get over the man I’m in প্রণয় with.”
Nate bit his lip worriedly. He knew he shouldn’t say this but he was going to. He just wanted everything to go back to normal, like it used to be. “Are আপনি sure you’re in প্রণয় with Chuck? Maybe it’s just feelings of pity because Bart died.”
Blair’s eyes turned dark with anger. “You have some fucking nerve Nate, I know for a fact that I’m in প্রণয় with Chuck. He means everything to me. I can’t believe আপনি would say these things to me. Just because he’s hurt me doesn’t mean that I still don’t প্রণয় him.”
“Do আপনি প্রণয় him like আপনি loved me, Blair?”
A little smiled played across her lips. “No. I প্রণয় him আরো than I ever loved you. It’s different. With you, I felt comfort and familiarity, and that was nice. But with Chuck, it’s all about passion and heat, and he makes me feel whole. When I’m with him I just feel perfect, he gets me like no one has ever understood me before. Yes, we fight, but even that feels somehow right. We just have this amazing banter.”
Nate felt sorry for her, he really did. But he had to make her see the light somehow. “If he felt the same way then I would be all for it, Blair. But I know he doesn’t, I think it’s just all about the chase for Chuck. He doesn’t প্রণয় you.”
Blair felt pair constrict in her chest at his words, but she pushed it aside. “You know nothing about our relationship, Nate. He may not প্রণয় me like I প্রণয় him, but he cares about me. That much I know.”
He looked around at the courtyard they were standing in and saw that snow was starting to fall again. “I don’t know if he does, Blair.”
She counted to ten in her head. She really felt like physically hurting Nate, and the feeling scared her. But how dare he pretend like he knew anything about them. “If he cares nothing for me like আপনি suggest, how do আপনি explain what he’s done.”
A confused look came over his face, as usual. “What has Chuck done?”
Blair smiled victoriously. “If he doesn’t care for me, why would he ruin his friendship with আপনি for me?” She saw the shocked look on his face and laughed gleefully. “That night in the limo, we both knew that আপনি would find out eventually, but it didn’t stop us. All we were thinking about is how much we wanted each other, and I don’t think we thought about আপনি once that evening. All I knew was that I wanted Chuck and nothing else mattered to me. Now, do আপনি really think that Chuck would ruin his friendship with আপনি if I didn’t mean anything to him?”
She noticed that he was speechless, so she continued. “I’m not trying to get আপনি annoyed Nate, but I know that Chuck cares for me somewhat. He’s chased me for over a বছর and we both know that when he sleeps with someone, he forgets them immediately. That didn’t happen with me. I don’t even know why I’m defending him, when all he’s done is hurt me, but I just know what I feel for him. So don’t act like আপনি know anything about us.” She smoothed her hands down her pristine black কোট and turned around to leave. Her হৃদয় stopped when she saw what was behind her.
Chuck was standing directly behind her, with his mouth gaping open. He had a shocked expression on his face.
How much worse could this দিন get? Did he hear everything she had just said? If he did, she was going to be so embarrassed.
Blair swallowed hard. “Hello, Chuck. Did আপনি manage to hear everything I just said?”
He nodded slowly. He still couldn’t speak, his brain was not capable of forming words just yet.
“Fuck.” She whispered savagely. “I guess I’ve made a fool of myself again.” She turned to look at Nate. “Does that make আপনি happy, Nate?” When neither of them answered her, she turned her back on both of them and ran out of the school courtyard and down the street. She kept running. A few মিনিট later she saw that she was on a deserted রাস্তা and that someone was following her and calling her name. She knew that voice. So she turned around.
She faced Chuck and saw that his was all windblown and so unlike his usual self. Her হৃদয় did the usual flip, when she was in such close proximity with him. She steeled herself to be ব্রেভ and act indifferent towards him.
“What do আপনি want, Chuck?”
He raked a hand through his hair, pushing it back away from his forehead. “What do I want? I want to talk about what I just overhead আপনি talking about with Nathaniel.”
She wet her lips with her tongue and saw that Chuck was watching her do this, so she stopped abruptly. “There’s nothing left to say. I looked like a complete fool again.” She started to walk away from him, but he caught up to her immediately.
He grasped her arm and turned her around to face him. “We’re not done here দ্বারা a longshot. We are going to discuss this, Blair. Whether আপনি like it অথবা not.”
She glared back at him. “Fine. Make it quick, I have other things to do.”
He stared at her, his eyes প্রদর্শিত হচ্ছে the emotion that he always kept so carefully guarded. “First, I want to apologize again for the whole mess the দিন of the brunch. Jack did set me up, but I have to take my share of the blame. I just didn’t want to drag আপনি into this whole mess and I’m sorry for that. I realize now that I need you. I need আপনি আরো than I ever needed anything in my life.”
Blair felt tears spring into her eyes. This is what she had wanted all along, she just wanted for Chuck to be honest with her. But it was too late.”I do appreciate আপনি saying that but like I told আপনি that দিন in the elevator, I’m done. It’s a little too late.” She turned away from him again.
But she didn’t get far again. Chuck was right behind her. “It will never be too late for us, Blair.” He ব্যক্ত fiercely. “I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to get here, but I’m finally here.”
She slowly turned around. Her হৃদয় was doing a steady thumping, betraying her because she was excited at the words that were coming out of his mouth. “What do আপনি mean?”
He reached up with his hand to touch her face. His eyes never left hers. “Nate doesn’t know what the hell he’s talking about and I hope আপনি seriously didn’t listen to what he was saying. That দিন আপনি told me আপনি loved me, I wanted to say the words back to আপনি so bad. I felt my throat opening to say them, but then I stopped myself. I wasn’t ready then, I didn’t want to be with আপনি when I was in such a dark place myself. But I’m not there anymore. I’m ready to say them to আপনি now. Three words. Eight letters.”
She gripped his hand unconsciously, waiting to hear the words that were going to change her life forever.
Chuck gripped her hand back tightly. “I প্রণয় you, Blair. I know that আরো than anything else in my life. You’re the one constant stable thing in my life and I want আপনি to be there forever. I knew that night in the limo that something was different, it was just fucking perfect. And ever since that night I couldn’t get আপনি out of my head and I don’t want to anymore. All I know is that I want to be with you. Who knew that Chuck খাদ could get so mushy.”
Blair laughed at this. She felt the happiness radiating in her body. “You know that I প্রণয় আপনি too. I have for a long time and all I want is you. আপনি are what makes me happy Chuck, আরো than anything else. আরো than Yale, অথবা being বন্ধু with Serena, অথবা anything, I would give anything up to be with you. You’re not going to hurt me again, are you?”
He wrapped her in his arms. “I’m never going to hurt আপনি again. I’ve learned my lesson. I thought all I wanted to do in my life was drink, sleep around, and do all the things that seemed so Chuck খাদ like. But that all means nothing to me anymore, my life feels meaningless without আপনি Blair. I’m sorry for everything.”
She placed a finger at his lips. “That doesn’t matter anymore. We’re both finally at the same place and that is all the matters to me. I’ve waited for this দিন for a long time, Chuck.”
He smiled at her and kissed her. A true love’s kiss. Blair sank into the চুম্বন and it was even better then she remembered. When she came up for air, she saw Nate down the street. He was smiling and gave her a thumbs up sign. The laughter bubbled out of her chest. Everything was right now. Finally.

Finished.

A/N: So what did আপনি think? Reviews are always lovely.