1. Offer him চিনাবাদাম মাখন অর্থহীন that আপনি cooked yourself, and tell him that আপনি named it Cornelius অর্থহীন because it’s "nutty." Make sure it’s sticky and overdone.

2. Tell him that চুন green isn’t really his color, and that he’s really আরো of a winter.

3. Offer to take him to the mall to buy him some new clothes in different, আরো flattering colors.

4. Try to get him to যোগদান a conga line with আপনি and Voldemort and look very hurt if he refuses.

5. Tell him that "Scrimgeour always seemed like so much আরো of an authoritative figure."

6. Make up a theme song for him to the tune of "The Brady Bunch" and sing it wherever he goes.

7. Make up flyers containing the printed version of the theme song and hand it out to important Ministry officials.

8. Try to get him to যোগদান S.P.E.W., because "elves are people too!"

9. Paint a scar on your forehead and hop around singing, "We were telling the truth! We were telling the truth!" in an annoying, high pitched voice.

10. Give his বোলার hat to the giant squid. If he gets mad at you, tell him that আপনি were just trying to প্রদর্শনী your care for all species. Make sure to stare at him with big, কুকুরছানা eyes.