Tool's AMAZING birthday cake

When I was born, I was প্রদত্ত a choice - A big dick অথবা a good memory. I don't remember, what I chose.

Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

A wife is a sex object. Every time আপনি ask for sex, she objects.

Impotence: Nature's way of saying 'No hard feelings...'

There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men - 'don't' and 'stop', unless they are used together.

Panties: Not the best thing on earth, but পরবর্তি to the best thing on earth.

There are three stages of sex in a man's life: Tri Weekly, Try Weekly, and Try Weakly.

Virginity can be cured.

Virginity is...

So this বছর happens to be over in 11 hours and 32 minutes. And because of that I thought I could write a little something about each one of আপনি :]

Nate
The king. The king of randomness to be honest. He's just awesome and I have no idea what I (and the other pinjas) would have done without him. He must be some sort of a saint. He got the Leytoners and the Brucasers to become বন্ধু after such a long time fighting. That I respect him for. Also his pervert-ness is not to be wrong of. Even though it's kind of creepy, it's hilarious. Him and Tool together.. No needs to say আরো :] Nate. You're an...

CHAPTER TWO.

Cherry চেরি boom boom
Mary: HANNAH! COME HERE NOW!
H: What the HELL?
Mary: Did আপনি buy আইসক্রিম again? আপনি know I hate it.
H: First off, its taste is MANGO. Epic.
Mary: Yeah right.
H: And secondly, আপনি are a complete retard for not liking আইসক্রিম so shut up.
Mary: But there’s no room in the fridge for my vegetables.
DING DONG. Hannah runs to open, glad that she was saved from the “fight”.
Cat: নমস্কার my girl.
H: নমস্কার Kitty.
Mary: Who is it?
H: It’s Cat. She brought us some ice-cream.
Mary: আপনি have got to be kidding me. Mangos and আইসক্রিম are FORBIDDEN in here.
G: WHY ARE YOU...

Happy sweet sixteen my Ballah!:D
You better have a terrific day, and an amazing বছর ahead of you, cause আপনি deserve it!♥

Hannah! আপনি have this unique, amazing, incredible and loveable personality which আপনি just can't miss! আপনি make the room (forum) look at আপনি when আপনি step in, and আপনি somehow make me smile even though i'm having a real shitty day! And I don't think I have to tell আপনি about your world known (fanpop-known) cheating skils! PCBR (pathetic cheating শিশুরা rules) says it all!;P
You will always be my teacher/master/mentor (you choose), and I always enjoy cheating with you! Cheating...

Tis is BS -_-

To My Dearest Wife,

During the past year, I have attempted to make প্রণয় to আপনি 365 times. I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of only once every 10 days. The following is a তালিকা of why I didn't succeed আরো often:

We will wake the kids - 54 times

It's too late - 15 times

I'm too tired - 42 times

It's too early - 12 times

It's too hot - 18 times

Pretending to be asleep - 31 times

The neighbors will hear - 9 times

Headache অথবা backache - 26 times

Sunburn - 10 times

Your mother will hear us - 9 times

Not in the mood - 21 times

Watching the late প্রদর্শনী - 17 times

Too sore - 26 times

New hairdo...

Just goes to প্রদর্শনী how differently men and women look at things...

HER DIARY

Saturday night I thought he was অভিনয় weird. We had made plans to meet at a bar to have a drink. I was shopping with my বন্ধু all দিন long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment. Conversation wasn't flowing so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed but he kept quiet and absent. I asked him what was wrong he ব্যক্ত nothing. I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He ব্যক্ত it had nothing to do with me and not to worry. On the way প্রথমপাতা I...