June 12, 2009. Today Dad took me to the Department of Motor Vehicles, to get my drivers permit. Dad waited outside in the parking lot. When I came outside I showed him that I had gotten my first drivers permit. I got inside the front আসন of the car and the body guard that was with us tossed me the keys. My dad sat in the back আসন tapping his fingers on his lap. I put the key in the ignition and started the car. When I made the first turn my dad closed his eyes and cringed. On the way to rehearsal for This Is It, my dad criticized my every turn. When we pulled in the parking lot dad got out of the car and looked like he was going to throw up. All I got out of him were the words NEVER AGAIN. When we went to the rehearsal মহাকাশ I showed off my permit. After about fifteen মিনিট dad finally came inside the studio.
June 24, 2009. Boy am I tired. We have been rehearsing for twelve hours straight. As we were getting ready to leave my dad passed me the car keys. We walked down to the parking lot and I opened the door and got in. As we were driving, my dad made a strong remark on my driving skills. He said, “Stop pressing the breaks so fast, take it easy.” I kept my cool for so long that this was the last straw. I snapped back, “Dad আপনি haven’t driven in years, what do আপনি know?” Dad grabbed my shoulder and said, “Alanna Michael Jackson don’t talk to me in that tone” I said, “Well it’s true”. I couldn’t come up with a comeback so I pulled over the car and got out. As we switched seats in the car I said, “There are আপনি happy now? আপনি প্রদর্শনী me your impressive driving skills.” The rest of the car ride was completely silent, except when I sarcastically laughed under my breath when my dad went too soft on the breaks. I said, with my arms crossed “See dad you’re doing the same thing I was doing, it’s not me it’s the car.” My dad only responded দ্বারা shaking my head with disapproval. He said, “I didn’t raise আপনি to act like this.” I said, “Listen dad, I’m not your little baby anymore. I’m fifteen and a half now. আপনি should accept it দ্বারা now. I could see that my dad was starting to tear up but I had no regret অথবা remorse from what I had said. He said, “Why all of a sudden are আপনি অভিনয় like this?” I said, “because I’ m pissed off and tired of being treated like a little kid, and wearing a stupid mask when I go into public and rehearsals. Dad said, “I only have আপনি were a mask because I প্রণয় you, and when we get প্রথমপাতা আপনি can go straight to your room to think about what আপনি are saying to me. দ্বারা now my dad was full out crying and very upset. When we got প্রথমপাতা I stormed up to my bedroom just as my dad was shutting his bedroom door. With tears still streaming down his face I looked at him and said, “You know some days I wish আপনি were dead,” And then slammed the door shut. I sat on my বিছানা and picked up the framed picture of me and dad from the nightstand. I stared at it for about five minutes. Then I picked up my cell phone and scrolled through some of my old text messages. I came across a text message from my dad that read- (I luv u so much I wil c u soon). I started to cry and finally realized the, intensity and hurtfulness I had put upon my dad. After about forty five মিনিট of crying I walked to my dad’s bedroom and knocked on his door. Dr. Murry answered the door and ব্যক্ত he was sleeping and would pass the apology to my dad.
June 25, 2009. Prince swung open my bedroom door and shook me awake. He ব্যক্ত hurry; there is something wrong with dad. I ran into dad’s bedroom as fast as I could. I stood there in shock as I saw my father lying unresponsive as he was being প্রদত্ত CPR. Prince and I ran down stairs and formed a prayer বৃত্ত and prayed for my father. When the অ্যাম্বুলেন্স left our house we followed them. When we got there, grandma and Uncle Frank were waiting for us. There was an uneasy amount of silence in the room. Uncle Frank said, “I’m sorry but your father passed a way.” I completely collapsed on my knees and began to ball my eyes out. I kept reaping over and over again. “It’s all my fault”. Grandma ব্যক্ত it wasn’t my fault, but I refused to believe it. Prince, Paris and Blanket went in to the room where dad’s body was. After they were done, I went in দ্বারা myself. I looked at my dad’s lifeless body and sat down in the chair পরবর্তি to his bed. I hid my face into my hands and said, “I’m so sorry this is all my fault.” Crying hysterically I said, I would carry out your legacy দ্বারা following in your footsteps. I couldn’t take being in there any longer so I left. Wiping the last few tears off my face I went back to যোগদান everybody else. Uncle Frank pulled out a piece of paper of his pocked and passed it to me. He said,”Your dad told me to give this to আপনি if anything bad would happen to him.” I looked at the শীর্ষ of the paper and it read MJJ recording contract. Prince put his hand on my shoulder and asked me what it was. Before I knew it my Uncle handed me a pen. It was time for me to fulfill my destiny.
June 24, 2009. Boy am I tired. We have been rehearsing for twelve hours straight. As we were getting ready to leave my dad passed me the car keys. We walked down to the parking lot and I opened the door and got in. As we were driving, my dad made a strong remark on my driving skills. He said, “Stop pressing the breaks so fast, take it easy.” I kept my cool for so long that this was the last straw. I snapped back, “Dad আপনি haven’t driven in years, what do আপনি know?” Dad grabbed my shoulder and said, “Alanna Michael Jackson don’t talk to me in that tone” I said, “Well it’s true”. I couldn’t come up with a comeback so I pulled over the car and got out. As we switched seats in the car I said, “There are আপনি happy now? আপনি প্রদর্শনী me your impressive driving skills.” The rest of the car ride was completely silent, except when I sarcastically laughed under my breath when my dad went too soft on the breaks. I said, with my arms crossed “See dad you’re doing the same thing I was doing, it’s not me it’s the car.” My dad only responded দ্বারা shaking my head with disapproval. He said, “I didn’t raise আপনি to act like this.” I said, “Listen dad, I’m not your little baby anymore. I’m fifteen and a half now. আপনি should accept it দ্বারা now. I could see that my dad was starting to tear up but I had no regret অথবা remorse from what I had said. He said, “Why all of a sudden are আপনি অভিনয় like this?” I said, “because I’ m pissed off and tired of being treated like a little kid, and wearing a stupid mask when I go into public and rehearsals. Dad said, “I only have আপনি were a mask because I প্রণয় you, and when we get প্রথমপাতা আপনি can go straight to your room to think about what আপনি are saying to me. দ্বারা now my dad was full out crying and very upset. When we got প্রথমপাতা I stormed up to my bedroom just as my dad was shutting his bedroom door. With tears still streaming down his face I looked at him and said, “You know some days I wish আপনি were dead,” And then slammed the door shut. I sat on my বিছানা and picked up the framed picture of me and dad from the nightstand. I stared at it for about five minutes. Then I picked up my cell phone and scrolled through some of my old text messages. I came across a text message from my dad that read- (I luv u so much I wil c u soon). I started to cry and finally realized the, intensity and hurtfulness I had put upon my dad. After about forty five মিনিট of crying I walked to my dad’s bedroom and knocked on his door. Dr. Murry answered the door and ব্যক্ত he was sleeping and would pass the apology to my dad.
June 25, 2009. Prince swung open my bedroom door and shook me awake. He ব্যক্ত hurry; there is something wrong with dad. I ran into dad’s bedroom as fast as I could. I stood there in shock as I saw my father lying unresponsive as he was being প্রদত্ত CPR. Prince and I ran down stairs and formed a prayer বৃত্ত and prayed for my father. When the অ্যাম্বুলেন্স left our house we followed them. When we got there, grandma and Uncle Frank were waiting for us. There was an uneasy amount of silence in the room. Uncle Frank said, “I’m sorry but your father passed a way.” I completely collapsed on my knees and began to ball my eyes out. I kept reaping over and over again. “It’s all my fault”. Grandma ব্যক্ত it wasn’t my fault, but I refused to believe it. Prince, Paris and Blanket went in to the room where dad’s body was. After they were done, I went in দ্বারা myself. I looked at my dad’s lifeless body and sat down in the chair পরবর্তি to his bed. I hid my face into my hands and said, “I’m so sorry this is all my fault.” Crying hysterically I said, I would carry out your legacy দ্বারা following in your footsteps. I couldn’t take being in there any longer so I left. Wiping the last few tears off my face I went back to যোগদান everybody else. Uncle Frank pulled out a piece of paper of his pocked and passed it to me. He said,”Your dad told me to give this to আপনি if anything bad would happen to him.” I looked at the শীর্ষ of the paper and it read MJJ recording contract. Prince put his hand on my shoulder and asked me what it was. Before I knew it my Uncle handed me a pen. It was time for me to fulfill my destiny.
