Who was that? That name...The taboo of my life. "Bella, is that really you?", the boy said. It seems to be so close but my mind was so far. I felt like I was eight years old again. I felt a soft caress on my shoulder. It was so soft maybe I imagined it but my body reacted on instinct and flinched away from it. Though my mind seems to disagree with my body. Then did I turn and come face to face with those piercing green orbs that haunt my dreams, ensare my senses and send tingles through my body.
Edward... There it was, the shock of the moment made me gasp. In less than a milli সেকেন্ড I was enveloped দ্বারা his strong arms. "Oh Bella, Bella, I missed আপনি so much. Where have আপনি been?", he crooned repeatedly. দ্বারা then tears were streaming down my cheeks. All the emotion I locked away all those years পূর্বে came crashing down. The relief, the hurt, the প্রণয় and the despair. But through all that one emotion was stronger than the other. Anger.
I ripped myself away from his arm. The shock and hurt of losing the contact clearly evident on his face. "Bella, I...", he began but I silenced him with my hand. "If আপনি are going to utter the word sorry পরবর্তি আপনি are in grave trouble, Edward", my voice barely a whisper but all the আরো scary. He seemed utterly surprised, hurt and another emotion I couldn't quite place.
"But Bella I...", he began again. "No, Edward. Do আপনি have any idea what I have been through. আপনি ব্যক্ত আপনি would always be there for me but আপনি weren't. When I got me first period আপনি were not there. I was so scared. When Madam gave me away to some... to some," I couldn't go on. All the things that happened he wasn't there for me and now he acts like he missed me. My mind screamed that my actions were wrong but I have come a long way without him and now having changes everything that I thought I would be and have been.
I could see he was clearly surprised and his hands twitched at his sides, a nervous habit he has when he wants to touch something. Well in this case, me. I found my arms opening upto him, inviting him and breaking down inside. Even through my anger I couldn't ভালুক to see him sad. The hurt I felt was reflected in his eyes.
And he openly accepted my embrace. He was clearly a foot অথবা আরো taller than me. His large hands cocooned me. The feeling of protection, প্রণয় and belonging was humming in the air. I broke out of the embrace to look at him. I still saw the boy I fell in প্রণয় with. What? No!! I loved as a brother back then. But now his sheek অস্থি were আরো defined. His mop was penny coloured hair standing out against the pale complexion. Always the most striking part of Edward. His lips... No! I am not going there. In the back of mind I knew he was handsome and he would never be mine.
The very thought broke my reverie. I shook his hands away. "Bella what's wrong sweetheart?" Sweetheart? Oh fate was really testing me. Only if that were true Edward.
"Nothing Edward. Just go. I have a lot to unpack." He looked around the room. He knew it was a lie. I had hardly anything to my name. There certainly wasn't a closet full of clothes to put away.
"Bella I don't understand why আপনি are অভিনয় this way," he ব্যক্ত in a whisper. "We have met after so long and now this. I don't know what I did wrong"
"Just go Edward. Please. I am very tired," both physically and emotionally I added in my head. Then I turned away from his glorius face. My head punding. I didn't want to look away but I knew I have to. If I let him in, he will leave me. But maybe this time it would be different. Sometimes the হৃদয় really does thing for reasons which reasons cannot understand.
The মিনিট he left I felt the emptiness, the lack of warmth and the feeling of belonging. I broke down crying. I was sure he could hear my loud sobs but I didn't care.
The door opened again. "Edward I thought I told আপনি to go," i sighed.
"I am not Edward," it was Alice who ব্যক্ত that. The পূর্ববর্তি friendliness all drained away. When I looked the pure look of hatred shook me. She seemed to have gained height and that scared me.
"You won't listen to Edward but আপনি will listen to me Isabella. আপনি don't know half the things he has been through. আপনি have no idea how he has been. He says আপনি are his best friend, well I don't think আপনি deserve him. আপনি are probably the worst friend anyone could ever have," she shouted in my face and with a loud bang, the door must be, there was silence.
Cruel, loud and impregnable silence. Another bout of tears broke through shaking my entire body until I felt the very familiar darkness envelope. Before I fully blacked out the creak of the door brought a voice, my Edward, "Bella, please...," suddenly stopped then a little louder "Bella! Are আপনি okay? Come on Bella. I can't lose আপনি again. Please. Alice! Alice! Get here! What did আপনি do?" With that I fell into the abyss of darkness.
Edward... There it was, the shock of the moment made me gasp. In less than a milli সেকেন্ড I was enveloped দ্বারা his strong arms. "Oh Bella, Bella, I missed আপনি so much. Where have আপনি been?", he crooned repeatedly. দ্বারা then tears were streaming down my cheeks. All the emotion I locked away all those years পূর্বে came crashing down. The relief, the hurt, the প্রণয় and the despair. But through all that one emotion was stronger than the other. Anger.
I ripped myself away from his arm. The shock and hurt of losing the contact clearly evident on his face. "Bella, I...", he began but I silenced him with my hand. "If আপনি are going to utter the word sorry পরবর্তি আপনি are in grave trouble, Edward", my voice barely a whisper but all the আরো scary. He seemed utterly surprised, hurt and another emotion I couldn't quite place.
"But Bella I...", he began again. "No, Edward. Do আপনি have any idea what I have been through. আপনি ব্যক্ত আপনি would always be there for me but আপনি weren't. When I got me first period আপনি were not there. I was so scared. When Madam gave me away to some... to some," I couldn't go on. All the things that happened he wasn't there for me and now he acts like he missed me. My mind screamed that my actions were wrong but I have come a long way without him and now having changes everything that I thought I would be and have been.
I could see he was clearly surprised and his hands twitched at his sides, a nervous habit he has when he wants to touch something. Well in this case, me. I found my arms opening upto him, inviting him and breaking down inside. Even through my anger I couldn't ভালুক to see him sad. The hurt I felt was reflected in his eyes.
And he openly accepted my embrace. He was clearly a foot অথবা আরো taller than me. His large hands cocooned me. The feeling of protection, প্রণয় and belonging was humming in the air. I broke out of the embrace to look at him. I still saw the boy I fell in প্রণয় with. What? No!! I loved as a brother back then. But now his sheek অস্থি were আরো defined. His mop was penny coloured hair standing out against the pale complexion. Always the most striking part of Edward. His lips... No! I am not going there. In the back of mind I knew he was handsome and he would never be mine.
The very thought broke my reverie. I shook his hands away. "Bella what's wrong sweetheart?" Sweetheart? Oh fate was really testing me. Only if that were true Edward.
"Nothing Edward. Just go. I have a lot to unpack." He looked around the room. He knew it was a lie. I had hardly anything to my name. There certainly wasn't a closet full of clothes to put away.
"Bella I don't understand why আপনি are অভিনয় this way," he ব্যক্ত in a whisper. "We have met after so long and now this. I don't know what I did wrong"
"Just go Edward. Please. I am very tired," both physically and emotionally I added in my head. Then I turned away from his glorius face. My head punding. I didn't want to look away but I knew I have to. If I let him in, he will leave me. But maybe this time it would be different. Sometimes the হৃদয় really does thing for reasons which reasons cannot understand.
The মিনিট he left I felt the emptiness, the lack of warmth and the feeling of belonging. I broke down crying. I was sure he could hear my loud sobs but I didn't care.
The door opened again. "Edward I thought I told আপনি to go," i sighed.
"I am not Edward," it was Alice who ব্যক্ত that. The পূর্ববর্তি friendliness all drained away. When I looked the pure look of hatred shook me. She seemed to have gained height and that scared me.
"You won't listen to Edward but আপনি will listen to me Isabella. আপনি don't know half the things he has been through. আপনি have no idea how he has been. He says আপনি are his best friend, well I don't think আপনি deserve him. আপনি are probably the worst friend anyone could ever have," she shouted in my face and with a loud bang, the door must be, there was silence.
Cruel, loud and impregnable silence. Another bout of tears broke through shaking my entire body until I felt the very familiar darkness envelope. Before I fully blacked out the creak of the door brought a voice, my Edward, "Bella, please...," suddenly stopped then a little louder "Bella! Are আপনি okay? Come on Bella. I can't lose আপনি again. Please. Alice! Alice! Get here! What did আপনি do?" With that I fell into the abyss of darkness.
It's all hats off now, all drum rolls and applause
দ্বারা slight of the hand আপনি will turn them into dust
A face to face আপনি will lead them দ্বারা the fall
A track fiend and the saw dust
You're allowed to stare it out
It’s all good luck charms
All trying to understand
Indeed inside me will always hope for worse
আপনি say আপনি keep them close by
They're closer than আপনি think
A track fiend and the saw dust
You're allowed to stare it out
পরবর্তি spring will bring আপনি back again
You'll sigh and crack the whip for us
And maybe আপনি will be the one
Who'll draw the line in the sand
For us to crawl
It's all past bats now
All painting gorgeous time
And maybe when the night comes
You'll open up the cage
You'll open up the cage
দ্বারা slight of the hand আপনি will turn them into dust
A face to face আপনি will lead them দ্বারা the fall
A track fiend and the saw dust
You're allowed to stare it out
It’s all good luck charms
All trying to understand
Indeed inside me will always hope for worse
আপনি say আপনি keep them close by
They're closer than আপনি think
A track fiend and the saw dust
You're allowed to stare it out
পরবর্তি spring will bring আপনি back again
You'll sigh and crack the whip for us
And maybe আপনি will be the one
Who'll draw the line in the sand
For us to crawl
It's all past bats now
All painting gorgeous time
And maybe when the night comes
You'll open up the cage
You'll open up the cage
Your lips are nettles
Your tongue is wine
Your laughter’s liquid
But your body’s pine
আপনি প্রণয় all sailors
But hate the beach
আপনি say come touch me
But you’re always out of reach
In the dark আপনি tell me of a flower
That only blooms in the বেগুনী hour
Your arms are lovely
Yellow and rose
Your back’s a meadow
Covered in snow
Your thighs are thistles
And hot-house grapes
আপনি breathe your sweet breath
And have me wait
In the dark আপনি tell me of a flower
That only blooms in the বেগুনী hour
I turn the lights out
I clean the sheets
আপনি change the station
Turned up the heat
And now you’re sitting
Upon your chair
You’ve got me ট্যাঙ্গেল্ড up
Inside your beautiful black hair
In the dark আপনি tell me of a flower
That only blooms in the বেগুনী hour
In the dark আপনি tell me of a flower
That only blooms in the বেগুনী hour
Your tongue is wine
Your laughter’s liquid
But your body’s pine
আপনি প্রণয় all sailors
But hate the beach
আপনি say come touch me
But you’re always out of reach
In the dark আপনি tell me of a flower
That only blooms in the বেগুনী hour
Your arms are lovely
Yellow and rose
Your back’s a meadow
Covered in snow
Your thighs are thistles
And hot-house grapes
আপনি breathe your sweet breath
And have me wait
In the dark আপনি tell me of a flower
That only blooms in the বেগুনী hour
I turn the lights out
I clean the sheets
আপনি change the station
Turned up the heat
And now you’re sitting
Upon your chair
You’ve got me ট্যাঙ্গেল্ড up
Inside your beautiful black hair
In the dark আপনি tell me of a flower
That only blooms in the বেগুনী hour
In the dark আপনি tell me of a flower
That only blooms in the বেগুনী hour