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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Warning, this has a extremely intense car chase. If আপনি don't like intense action then do not read

Russians: *driving trucks*
Con: *driving behind them*
Russian trucker1: Who is that pony?
Sanchez: Attention, Con Mane has stolen one of our trucks. Stop him at all costs!
Russian trucker 1: I see him! *slows down*
Russian pony45: *driving bus*
Russian pony89: Stop!
Russian pony45: *stops* Get the rocket launchers, they're in the trunk.
Russian pony89: *grabs rocket launcher*
Russian trucker 1: *rams Con*
Con: *rams trucker*
Citizen 8975: *spins off road*
Con: *rams truck into canyon*
Construction worker: Wave that flag so the truck won't hit this ramp.
Construction worker2: Ok
Russian pony89: He's getting close *aims rocket*
Con: *goes faster*
Russian pony89: *shoots rocket*
Con: *gets truck on one side*
Construction workers: Aaaahh *runs away*
Russian pony89: How did I miss?!
Con: *drives toward them*
Russians: *run toward bus*
Con: *lands truck on bus*
Rain: *flies above* Oh man!
Con: *driving toward other truckers*
Russian trucker 2: *grabs mini uzi*
Con: *hits truck*
Russian trucker 2: *shoots tires on trailer*
Con: *stops truck*
Russian unicorns: *teleports near Con* Fire! *shoot at Con*
Rain: *throws grenade*
Russians: Where did this come from?! *die*
Con: Nice work Rain!
Rain: Your welcome!
Con: *unhitches trailer, then drives truck*
Sanchez: Take the wheel of my car, I'm going in that bigrig!
Russian pony90: How?
Sanchez: With wings idiot! *flies into big rig*
Russian trucker 3: Sir!
Sanchez: Keep driving, forget I'm here.
Con: *gets behind 2nd truck*
Russian trucker 2: *shoots windows*
Con: *pushes truck off road*
Russian trucker 2: Oh great!
2nd truck: *explodes*
Sanchez: Now he's heading towards us, floor it!
Russian trucker 3: *goes faster*
Con: *catches up*
Sanchez: Of course! HE has no trailer, so he can go faster then us!
Con: *gets behind 3rd truck*
Sanchez: *shoots at Con*
Con: *sets his truck to cruise control*
Russian trucker 3: Oh great! A hill!
Con: *jumps onto 3rd truck*
Sanchez: He's on the trailer! *shoots at Con*
Con: *sets charge on trailer*
Sanchez: What is he doing?
Con: *teleports off truck*
Sanchez: Hah! He left. That wimp couldn't deal with us!
Con: *detonates charge*
Russian trucker 3: *drives off cliff*
Con: do svidaniya Sanchez!
Sanchez: *flies up* আপনি forgot I'm a pegasus!
Con: Oh shit *hits Sanchez*
Sanchez: *kicks Con*
Con: *breaks Sanchez's wings*
Sanchez: *falls on street*
Bus driver: *drives toward them*
Sanchez: *shoots driver*
driver: *flips bus over*
Con: *kicks Sanchez*
Sanchez: *makes fuel leak, but doesn't know*
Con: *pushes Sanchez into gasoline*
Sanchez: *hits Con*
Con: *breaks Sanchez's arm*
Sanchez: All this! আপনি did all this for what purpose?
Con: For a friend *grabs lighter, and sets Sanchez on fire*
Rain: *flies toward Con* How about getting us back home?
Con: Yes sir!
Rain: *laughs*

1 and a half days later

Fenix: The doctor says I'll be out in a few weeks.
Con: Hey, congrats on surviving a হাঙ্গর bite, those aren't usual!
Fenix: Thanks my friend, I just hope Roseluck is alright.
Roseluck: I'm right here Fenix
Con: We have to go now, bye *hangs up*
Fenix: *hangs up* What a great pony.
Roseluck: So what do আপনি wanna do now?
Con: *spots Rain* Jump in the pool *jumps in pool*
Rain: আপনি got me wet!
Con: Sorry. Can I help আপনি dry off?
Rain: Without magic? Sure
Con: *hugs Rain*
Rain: *kisses Con*

The End

Con Mane will return
 Con gets a truck on one side
Con gets a truck on one side
আপনি see that weight on your wings?
So i know what you're feeling
Yeah, আপনি got bigger dreams
So keep on believing

Don't let your colors
bleed into grey
We got each other
and chances to take
Yeah, আপনি got bigger dreams
So keep on believing

I'll chase the sky with you
I'll chase the night with you
I'll chase the light with you
If আপনি wanna fly
I'll chase the sky

Whoa oh oh oh
Whoa oh oh oh
Whoa oh oh oh
If আপনি wanna fly
I'll chase the sky

Anything in your heart
Is আরো than worth keeping (Mmm)
I'll shoot for the stars
If that's what আপনি needed

Just say the word
and baby, i'll run
I'll find a way
to go beyond the sun
I'll...
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posted by TimberHumphrey
so here are a few theories i got for this show:

Theory #1: since Hasbro and DHX never even bothered to give Cozy Glow any semblance of a backstory, my theory is that she's actually a fully-grown adult টাট্টু stuck inside a filly's body. she was born with a condition that never let her physically age after filly-hood.

Theory #2: while we do know Sunset used to be Celestia's শীর্ষ student, i always thought there was something আরো to it than just a teacher-student relationship. and since we never get to see if Sunset had parents at some point in time, my theory is that she's Celestia's adopted daughter. remember how worried Celestia was about Sunset at the end of the first EqG movie? yeah, something tells me they're আরো than just teacher and ex-student.

Theory #3: at one point in time, King Sombra used to be a great and loved king, before he became corrupted দ্বারা his desire for power that forced Celestia and Luna to banish him into the abyss.
posted by Seanthehedgehog
The final part of Tom Foolery's প্রদর্শনী is here.

Tom: Now, most of আপনি probably don't know this, but we all have several things in common. I'll give আপনি an example. We're all here together, in the greatest city in Maressouri.
Crowd: *Clapping*
Tom: I have some even funnier ones. When you're in your car, and আপনি stop at a red light. Do আপনি ever try to সরানো an extra inch অথবা two?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: But when আপনি see other cars in front of you, you're in no rush to get as close to the other guy as possible. আপনি just coast to the red light.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Coast to the red light, then all of a sudden...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Tom was now making fun of the modern movie industry.

Tom: As much as I enjoy being an actor, when I'm not entertaining আপনি with jokes.
Crowd: *Quietly laughing*
Tom: I always want to make sure the movie I'm in is good. They're not all comedies, my most সাম্প্রতিক film, Suicide was actually quite dark. Yet for some reason, comedians feel like it's a great way to improve their career. Correct me if I'm wrong, but being in a dramatic R-rated film will not improve your comedy career.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: That's why no one knows who Jim Carrey is anymore.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: His সাম্প্রতিক role as Dr. Robotnik...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Tom continued insulting politicians, much to the delight of his audience.

Tom: Presidential candidates are always a good target for comedians to make fun of, but আপনি know what another জনপ্রিয় target is? Black Lives Matter.
Crowd: *Cheering*
Tom: Many black ponies are accusing millions of ponies of the Caucasian race, for something only one police officer did in the Midwest!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Who's the racist now আপনি assholes?!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: And do আপনি really think that every single Caucasian hates blacks?! When did we time travel back to the 18th Century?!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Even the...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
What's a comedy প্রদর্শনী without politics? Tom is going to make fun of the presidential election.

Tom: I don't know what's worse, this covid pandemic, অথবা the presidential election.
Crowd: Yeah!!!
Tom: I don't trust either Trump, অথবা Biden so I'm not going to vote. *Talks like a filly* But Tom, it's important for the economy!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Losing jobs, and spending money on taxes is not good for the economy!
Crowd: *Cheering*
Tom: I don't give a fuck what ponies tell me. I don't trust the president, I don't trust the princess, I don't trust anyone that works for the Equestrian government! Why?...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
After mentioning things আপনি should only do alone, Tom had another segment for his audience to enjoy.

Tom: আপনি know one thing I like to do when I'm alone? Rewatch some episodes of On The Block.
Crowd: *Cheering*
Tom: Not only do I enjoy comedy, but I also enjoy being an actor. It's the only job where আপনি can get away with murder.
Crowd: *Quietly laughing*
Tom: Unless you're Robert Deniro, and the main protagonist is Al Pacino.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Seeing those two together was a lot of fun, but what really surprised me was seeing Pacino as a cop. He's normally the criminal, but I still got a kick...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!


St. Foalis Maressouri, 6 PM.

A crowd of thousands of ponies gathered at the Gateway Arch to experience a comedy প্রদর্শনী that was being filmed live in 4k. The comedian? Tom Foolery.

Crowd: *Clapping, and chanting* Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom!
Tom: *Arrives at a temporary stage under the Gateway Arch*
Crowd: *Cheering, as they continue to clap*
Tom: Thank আপনি everypony.
Crowd: *Continuing to cheer and clap*
Tom: Thank আপনি very much.
Crowd: *Continuing to cheer and clap*
Tom: And shut up.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom:...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog


Jerry: Sorry, but I got nothing.
Vito: I don't feel like dying. That's the reason we left the family in the first place.
Harlan: *Hears a car* What's that? *Looks out the window*
Vito: What is it?
Harlan: A cop.

The three stallions started to panic, but Vito had a plan.

Vito: I think I know what to do. Go upstairs and let me handle this.
Police Pony: *Rings the doorbell*
Vito: *Opens the door* How can I help আপনি officer?
Police Pony: We got a complaint a while ago. Apparently this morning, some ponies had a gunfight just in front of your house. আপনি know anything about this?
Vito: No. I was riding...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
What to expect in this episode.

Twilight Sparkle: *In a black পরিবর্তনযোগ্য with two Royal Guards. A bullet hits the door of the পরিবর্তনযোগ্য they're in*
Royal Guard: Princess, get down!

---

Captain Jefferson: Someone tried to assassinate the princess as she entered our town.

---

Twilight: Why would somepony want me dead?
Toby: That's what we're trying to find out.

---

Tim: *Gets punched three times দ্বারা a blue unicorn. He gets punched one আরো time, and his glasses break*

Intro
Song: link

Julia: *Driving her police car on the round freeway*
Tim: *Sitting পরবর্তি to her*

Gran Turismo

Starring Larry Wilcox as Tim...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
What to expect in this week's episode.

Tim: You're splitting us up?
Captain Jefferson: Just until Saturday. Someone's gotta teach the new guys what to do.

---

Pony: *Driving a sports car* Turn on the nitrous.
Pony 2: *Turns on the nitrous*
Pony: *Going faster*

---

Captain Jefferson: These two guys are wanted দ্বারা the State Troopers, both in this state, and in Pennsylvania.
Tim: *Driving after the bad guys*
Captain Jefferson: We gotta be on our game.
Tim: *Hits another car, and goes on two wheels*

Song: link

Julia: *Driving her police car on the round freeway*
Tim: *Sitting পরবর্তি to her*

Gran Turismo

Starring...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
When Saten Twist returned to Los Angeles in the Super Chief, he saw Jake looking at him.

Jake: *Angry*
Saten: *Sweating* Why is he giving me that look? *Stops the train*
Jake: *Tapping his left front hoof on the ground, waiting for Saten Twist*
Saten: *Climbs down from the engine's cab* Why are আপনি angry at me?
Jake: আপনি owe me an apology for the way আপনি talked to me yesterday.
Saten: John-
Jake: IT'S JAKE!!!!
Saten: Why are আপনি getting angry at me all of a sudden?
Jake: Your lecture towards me made me lose my job, and now I can't find work anywhere else.
Saten: আপনি quit?
Jake: Yeah. I'm still waiting...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!


Song: link
 Celestia: *Runs from the left. She jumps up, her wings spreading wide, then her face gets into the triangle*
Celestia: *Runs from the left. She jumps up, her wings spreading wide, then her face gets into the triangle*


Albuquerque, New Mexicolt. July 19th, 1958

Saten Twist: *Walking towards the Super Chief*
Stallion 16: Here to take this train all the way to Los Angeles?
Saten Twist: *Nods, and climbs into the cab*
Conductor: All aboard!!
Saten Twist: *Blows the horn twice, and makes the train go forward*
 This is the train Saten Twist is driving, called the Super Chief. A luxury train for ponies.
This is the train Saten Twist is driving, called the Super Chief. A luxury train for ponies....
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Oh shit, BT's not making fun of someone this time around? (well in an indirect way I might be but let's see where this goes)

Yeah, I don't care if anyone reads this, I just want to get this off of my chest, because I'm gonna try and be real with this site for once and it's 1 AM in the morning.

One thing I've noticed in the time that i've been a part of this club (since like, 2012 অথবা something, idk), is that this club has হারিয়ে গেছে its backbone. The সাম্প্রতিক year, now, I've been shitposting like mad, pissing in everyone's cornflakes. I have admittedly been the worst kind of person, for NO good reason....
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: facebook, EQD
posted by SomeoneButNoone
My name? Alonzo Langusa. Age when I started operating? 23.


Act II

Vengeance...

Living was hard. I had to hide my name. I had to find a good job yet there was not enough money. Life was rough and it was because of these man. Vincent Galar, Apollo Monetto and Angelo Vertezio. I was taught দ্বারা ma'am Crossroad not to kill. Yet I wanted to. I wanted vengeance. At age of 15 I started smoking and further drinking at age of 17 until at age of 23 I was kicked from my apartment. I went to Canterlot to find my good old friend her name was Clara. When I came she was shocked. I still remember it.


"Who are you?"...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
It was a cold night like this one when my father smoked his last cigarette in our family house. The night so cold even me myself did not want to go out. The time? As a kid আপনি don't care about that. It was dark, and it was winter. বড়দিন day. After Equestrian economical fall and industrial boom, everyone changed, the dirty mafias started to leak. My father was part of one of these. A high up. One of important people in Vertezio familia. Still on that night...

Act I

That Night...

"So how was your দিন outside" Father asked me with a smile. "Good" was all I answered. I was 11 what could I say....
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: ফেসবুক
posted by SomeoneButNoone
Darkness - *burst into room* Bad news! Void was kidnapped!
Dan - What?!
Snowflake - Void...


----
Location - ???
---

Void - *wakes up strapped to some টেবিল covered with bandages* What the...
Nyx - Good দিন VOID. I never thought আপনি will be the first to feel truth.
Void - What are you- *looks at him and see big machine behind him*
Nyx - Ah আপনি see this. My project. ফলমূল of my reschearch. The best weapon ever. আপনি know - cores are great aren't they. They stay alive for 20 years. But আপনি know what is better in them. Their power. A sheer power that may সরানো body অথবা stimulate brain. And this সেকেন্ড thing...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Tim, and Julia returned to the police station.

Captain Jefferson: Tim Miller, and Julia Rose.
Tim: Hello Captain.
Captain Jefferson: I heard about your heroic act on Monday Avenue. Well done.
Julia: Don't give us all of the credit Captain. There were other officers as well.
Captain Jefferson: I understand. When I see them, I'll give them their congrats as well.
Tim: We still on stakeout tomorrow Captain?
Captain Jefferson: That's right. You're on stakeout until further notice.

Next day.

Tim: *Driving his সর্প passing Local Consideration*
Julia: Let's check out The Highway.
Tim: *Turns right on Byer Lane*...
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