In the hospital

If আপনি have any I forgot, just let me know in মতামত and I'll add it. :)

1. আপনি rattle off যেভাবে খুশী উদ্ধৃতি throughout the day.
2. আপনি know what animal Maurice is, even though he doesn't look like one.
3. আপনি laugh whenever someone says 'succeed.' (And আপনি get that.)
4. আপনি know Kowalski's, Skipper's, and Private's worst fears.
5. আপনি hate sushi but eat it anyway.
6. Penguins, lemurs, otters, and dolphins are your পছন্দ animals.
7. আপনি think purple is a vegetable.
8. God doesn't exist; the Sky Spirits do.
9. You're a fangirl/fanboy of cartoon animals. Really? Cartoon animals? So weird.
10....

PROLOGUE: INTRODUCTION TO THESIS

Alright, so I have a "Broken-mind" as some may call it. My Corpus Callosum was many years ago, and I've disregarded the signs to this point. But now I fear I may still be প্রদর্শিত হচ্ছে signs of a split-brain. This clipboard is a sign of it. My keeping a clipboard for personal thoughts is somewhat বিভক্ত করা for my working clipboard. The other is a record of scientific thought, and my mathematical skills. But science often interferes with my personal thought, that which is yet to be explained.

Corpus Callosum, a treatment for "Split-brain". I have to record this, to remind...

link
^ original song. Thought it would be fun to সম্পাদনা it a bit based on thier personalities.
**edit-forgot to put Kowalski পরবর্তি to Leo. fixed now.
Aquarius (mort)
There's travel in your future when আপনি find yourself tied to the back of a speeding bus
Fill that void in your pathetic life দ্বারা playing Oku-Land seventeen hours a day

Pisces (Julien)
Try to avoid any Penguins অথবা Otters with the Cootie virus.
You are the true Lord of the Dance, no matter what those idiotic Baboons say.

Aries(Phil and Mason)
The look on your face will be priceless when আপনি find that forty year-old তরমুজ in your colon. (phil)...

Kowalski's Guide to Sciency Things 

Hi there. I'm Kowalski. The পেংগুইন brainiac, some will say. And sense আপনি are পাঠ করা this, the cause must be either আপনি want to learn how to do things আরো sciency, অথবা আপনি are bored out of your mind and this is the only thing আপনি can find to read.
Either way, আপনি are পাঠ করা it, so keep on doing it. Now I am not a reader, so I don't know how long introductions should be. I'll just stop here. 
Happy reading!

Sciency lesson #1, How to make it seem like you're smart

If আপনি want to be smart, আপনি have to make it seem like আপনি are. One of the things I do is talk...