I stagger forward. My footsteps fall heavily beneath me. I don’t know why I keep on running. Why am I doing this? Why have I ever done anything? I attacked Faith! She’s dying! Why don’t I turn around?
I’m selfish. I’m so selfish. Because I’m afraid. Because I’m afraid of Bernard’s wrath. Because I’m afraid to watch her die. “Turn around!” I scream at myself. But I just keep running, stumbling through the woods.
It feels like I run for hours. The darkness is so deep. I’m so tired. I’m so upset. I’m so lost. What have I done? I hurt Faith. Everything I’ve done in the past, it doesn’t seem to matter. What has my life been worth? What good have I done? My vision begins to grow blurry. The trees seem to twist and tilt. My legs feel wobbly beneath me.
I don’t know what to do. I’m so selfish. What have I done? There’s no point. I attacked Faith. She’s dying. I’m so selfish. I’m so disgusting. I don’t know what to do. My life; what have I ever done? What good did I ever bring into the world? Tears begin to fill my eyes. What have I done? I’m so angry at myself, all I can do is reflect on my life, on all the mistakes I’ve made. Mistakes that can never be reversed. I continue to ask the question, “What have I done?” but not just regarding what I did to Faith. What have I done? How could I have made so many mistakes in life? I’m so selfish. I hate my life. I hate what I’ve done. I hate who I am.
Ahead of me, I see a small, open area in the shape of a বৃত্ত within the trees. The closer I get, the আরো heavy my footsteps become. My dizziness increases. I start to feel strange. “Dammit,” I think, frustrated and sad. “What’s—what’s going on?” I stagger forward, losing my balance. I stumble into the center of the small, open area. I can’t stand anymore. And I have no will to fight what’s happening. I collapse onto my hands and knees. Tears drop from my eyes. “What’s happening?” I say aloud. “I can’t move.”
Then it hits me. I mentally replay the scene when Bernard walked into the cave right after I slashed Faith. “Guys, you’re really gonna’—” he said, before stopping out of confusion and shock. He sounded like he was excited about something. He went to fetch the petals of a poisonous plant; so this must mean—“I’ve been poisoned!” I think. Reaching back, I grasp the shaft of the অনুষ্ঠান- অ্যারো sticking into my shoulder. I didn’t even care to pull it out, though it pained me, but now I rip it out of my flesh. I gasp, falling onto my side. Blood surges from the hole in my shoulder. I’m losing feeling in my legs, now my lower back. The poison, it’s crawling up me.
As I feel my blood run down my back, I realize—emptiness and depression filling me—that it’s all the same. It’s like I never left my home. Here I am, bleeding out. I thought I wanted to die though. After attacking Faith, I thought it would just be better if I died. But now I don’t know. I’m scared. I’m helpless. I don’t want to die like this, having nothing good to look back on. But I don’t even think of redeeming myself. I don’t think of surviving. It’s too late.
My back loses all feeling, and another moment later, my neck is frozen. I’m scared. I start crying. “No!” I sob. But there’s no one to hear me. I’m alone. Then my breath catches, and I can’t breathe anymore. I can’t move. And just as the poison slowly overcomes me, I slowly resign myself to death. It’s over. The world goes black in an instant.
Any opinions???
Copyright 2015
I’m selfish. I’m so selfish. Because I’m afraid. Because I’m afraid of Bernard’s wrath. Because I’m afraid to watch her die. “Turn around!” I scream at myself. But I just keep running, stumbling through the woods.
It feels like I run for hours. The darkness is so deep. I’m so tired. I’m so upset. I’m so lost. What have I done? I hurt Faith. Everything I’ve done in the past, it doesn’t seem to matter. What has my life been worth? What good have I done? My vision begins to grow blurry. The trees seem to twist and tilt. My legs feel wobbly beneath me.
I don’t know what to do. I’m so selfish. What have I done? There’s no point. I attacked Faith. She’s dying. I’m so selfish. I’m so disgusting. I don’t know what to do. My life; what have I ever done? What good did I ever bring into the world? Tears begin to fill my eyes. What have I done? I’m so angry at myself, all I can do is reflect on my life, on all the mistakes I’ve made. Mistakes that can never be reversed. I continue to ask the question, “What have I done?” but not just regarding what I did to Faith. What have I done? How could I have made so many mistakes in life? I’m so selfish. I hate my life. I hate what I’ve done. I hate who I am.
Ahead of me, I see a small, open area in the shape of a বৃত্ত within the trees. The closer I get, the আরো heavy my footsteps become. My dizziness increases. I start to feel strange. “Dammit,” I think, frustrated and sad. “What’s—what’s going on?” I stagger forward, losing my balance. I stumble into the center of the small, open area. I can’t stand anymore. And I have no will to fight what’s happening. I collapse onto my hands and knees. Tears drop from my eyes. “What’s happening?” I say aloud. “I can’t move.”
Then it hits me. I mentally replay the scene when Bernard walked into the cave right after I slashed Faith. “Guys, you’re really gonna’—” he said, before stopping out of confusion and shock. He sounded like he was excited about something. He went to fetch the petals of a poisonous plant; so this must mean—“I’ve been poisoned!” I think. Reaching back, I grasp the shaft of the অনুষ্ঠান- অ্যারো sticking into my shoulder. I didn’t even care to pull it out, though it pained me, but now I rip it out of my flesh. I gasp, falling onto my side. Blood surges from the hole in my shoulder. I’m losing feeling in my legs, now my lower back. The poison, it’s crawling up me.
As I feel my blood run down my back, I realize—emptiness and depression filling me—that it’s all the same. It’s like I never left my home. Here I am, bleeding out. I thought I wanted to die though. After attacking Faith, I thought it would just be better if I died. But now I don’t know. I’m scared. I’m helpless. I don’t want to die like this, having nothing good to look back on. But I don’t even think of redeeming myself. I don’t think of surviving. It’s too late.
My back loses all feeling, and another moment later, my neck is frozen. I’m scared. I start crying. “No!” I sob. But there’s no one to hear me. I’m alone. Then my breath catches, and I can’t breathe anymore. I can’t move. And just as the poison slowly overcomes me, I slowly resign myself to death. It’s over. The world goes black in an instant.
Any opinions???
Copyright 2015
