1. Back away from each person saying, "EW! GERMS!"

2. Sit in someone's lap and say, "I'm afraid your going to die, Jimmy."

3. Bring a radio and play screamo music.

4. Every once in a while, ask a doctor, "IS IT MY TURN YET?!"

5. Ask everyone why they're just sitting there.

6. When Dorah comes on, sing the lyrics.

7. Grab toys such as বার্বি পুতুল and scream, "I'M GONNA KILL YOU! Look, Mr. Stuffy Wuff is happy!"

8. Yell, "IT'S A TRAP!" and tackle a যেভাবে খুশী patient.

9. Poke at someone's scab and yell, "IS THIS SCAB EATABLE?!"

10. When your finally called on, yell, "FINALLY! WHERE WERE YOU?!"

11. Go up to...

Ways to annoy people in Wal-Mart



Hilarious Ways to be annoying!















"Accidentally" get stuck in one of the ফ্রোজেন খাবার doors. Give people strange looks and see if anyone helps আপনি out.
Add really funny things to other peoples’ carts and watch them pay for it and see if they notice.
Around বড়দিন time, start caroling. Ask for money from the listeners.
As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!"
Ask if আপনি can buy a shopping cart.
Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.
Ask Someone if they know were they sell little babies!...

Jeez, so many lists about girls telling guys what they should do when imposing them and such... It's time to extinguish those high standards, with some cold, hard, facts about us. Fighting আগুন with fire. *puts on sunglasses* Oh yeah.

So girls, here's a তালিকা about boys, দ্বারা a boy.


Guys look, but don't flirt!
1. We look at other girls often, as ashamed as some of us might be about it. We're just naturally distracted. It, however, doesn't mean we're flirting with them straight away. Here's a প্রশ্ন I'd like to ask all girls in a relationship. What are আপনি expecting your boyfriend to do, cheat on...

1. When আপনি get pulled over, say "What's wrong, ossifer, there's no blood in my alcohol?"

2. When he asks why আপনি were speeding, tell him আপনি wanted to race.

3. When he talks to you, pretend আপনি are deaf.

4. If he asks if আপনি knew how fast আপনি were going, say no, my speedometer only goes to......

5. Ask if আপনি can see his gun.

6. When he says আপনি aren't allowed, tell him I just wanted to see if mine was bigger.

7. Touch him.

8. When he asks why আপনি were speeding, tell him আপনি had to buy a hat.

9. Ask him where he bought his cool hat.

10. Refer to him দ্বারা his first name.

11. Pretend আপনি are gay and ask...

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman’s birthday but never remembers her age.
A lighter? We’re going to need a flame-thrower to light up your candles.
Actually, I wanted to get আপনি something super great, super terrific, unique and beautiful for your birthday, but I don’t fit into the envelope.
Age is a high price to pay for maturity.
Age is an issue of mind over matter. If আপনি don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life ব্যক্ত Kitty Collins. Be glad you’re doing it gracefully.
An old fart is as good as a new one….



(written...

WARNING: This rant will contain swearing

This episode...oh god this episode...

It starts with the Griffin family stuck in their house during a Hurricane. The Griffins (excluding Meg) decides to play a game and Meg wants to যোগদান their game, they tell her:

"No one wants to be fingerbanged দ্বারা you!"

The Griffins are as***les towards Meg. And before আপনি Family Guy অনুরাগী start to flame me, Meg is my পছন্দ character.

Peter decides to annoy the whole family. To which Meg opens up a can of soda. Peter snaps at Meg, and surprisingly Meg stands up for herself.

Now what amazes me is that the প্রদর্শনী puts her...

"Naturally"


Did it seem
To disappoint you
Living alone?
দ্বারা the banks
Of your dilemma
Out of control
No one seems
To give the answers
That আপনি wanna hear
What you'd give
To find a welcome here

Miles and miles of lies
Behind you
Those were the days
So many lives
You'd hope would guide you
Help আপনি find a way
Now it seems to your surprise
That they left আপনি lying here
What you'd give to dry
These তিক্ত tears

Did it come naturally?
আপনি a million miles from home
When আপনি tried so carefully
To live a life
That's not your own
Always remember
That it wasn't that long ago
I stilled the oceans
I moved...

1. Dick Trickle

A NASCAR driver that sounds like he has symptoms of prostate problems. Yeah, this one definitely deserves the শীর্ষ spot on the list.

2. Rusty Kuntz
If he were a girl, it would possibly be number one on the list; nobody would want to mess with her.

3. Grant Balfour
Grant means “to give” and ball four represents a walk in baseball. Not exactly the best name for this Oakland A’s pitcher.

4. Pete LaCock
The capitalization of this name just makes it even worse. He gets the double whammy on the first and last name

5. Guy Whimper
He is a 6’5’’, 300lbs. offensive tackle for the Jacksonville...

1.Stand পরবর্তি to a bathroom, stroking a soap bottle while saying: "It's okay my darling, we will get out soon".

2.Sniff every type of cheese in the aisle.

3.When somebody walks দ্বারা you, stare at them with
BIG eyes.

4.Squirt every type of perfume আপনি can find.

5.When in the bathroom,scream as loud as আপনি can.

6.Tickle yourself in front of the toilet scrubbers.

7.Hop like a frog around the store.

8.Get a glowing pen and act like আপনি are scanning the দুধ and say:"We shall see".

9.Act like a detective, trying to find the missing Whipped Cream Monster.

10.Put on a স্কার্ট and do yoga in the middle of the store....

1. Walk into the classroom like a super spy. (keep your back on the walls as আপনি walk, point your finger up like a gun, look around with shifty eyes, hum the mission impossible theme, etc.)

2. After everything your teacher says, ask why.

3. If your teacher is yelling at a classmate, wait for them to finish their tantrum then ask” DOES SOMEBODY NEED A HUG?????” very loudly.

4. If your teacher starts blowing up at আপনি for saying that simply reply “Wow, I can tell you’re a blast at parties”

5. Dress up like এল-মৃত্যু পত্র (Death Note) and walk in with no shoes.

6. If your teacher asks “why aren’t...

Mittens.
They warm your hands, protect আপনি from the cold. They're not a bad thing.
But imagine if for your whole life আপনি wore heavy mittens. If আপনি dial a phone, try to use a remote control, অথবা try to play a board game, you're still wearing mittens. Practically everything is much আরো difficult.
Right there.
Practically everything is much আরো difficult.
Remember that.
Now imagine this.
You're in a room with the TV on full volume. The radio is blaring loud, screeching music. The lights are flickering on and off. Everything আপনি see is magnified, is a much bigger deal than it normally would...

1. Don't care about her feelings.
2. Don't allow her to go out without your permission.
3. Your friends, the game, and your video games are আরো important than her.
4. She needs to get আপনি খাবার while আপনি sit and do whatever আপনি want.
5. Call her a "whore" and a "bitch".
6. Beat her when she's not obeying you.
7. Never reply to her texts. Remember, you're "busy".
8. তীক্ষ্নভাবে her গাধা and grab her boobs.
9. Never tell her that আপনি প্রণয় her.
10. She pays for dinner, not you.
11. Force her to have sex with you.
12. She's pregnant? Break up with her. সরানো somewhere far, far away.
13. Never use a condom, even if...

A friend of mine has another friend that is addicted to meth. She found this and gave it to her friend. She then gave me a copy because she ব্যক্ত it was sad and cared enough to let me know what meth is and does.

This poem was written দ্বারা a young Indiana girl who was in jail for drug charges, and was addicted to Meth. She wrote this while in jail. As আপনি will soon read, she fully grasped the horrors of the drug, as she tells in this simple, yet profound poem. She was released from jail, but, true to her story, the drug owned her. They found her dead not long after, with the needle still in her...

Ashimoto ni kaze hikari ga matta nichijou ni dake tsumotta bun no kiseki ga
Miagereba kumo tooku e no kiro osanai hi no jibun yori mo hayaku
Yukidoke o matte ita kodomo no আপনি ni hashiru
Hikaru shizuku tobihaneteru
Asu no deai sae kizukazu ni iru kisetsu-tachi no naka de kagayaite iru yo

Sekaijuu ni wa donna omoi mo kanau hi ga kuru
Zutto tabi o shite yuku bokura ni chiisana sei-tachi maioriru

Deatta basho mo midori o nashite yuruyaka ni mo nagareru toki ni yudanete
Haruka ni aogu machinami no roji osanai hi no jibun ga mada kakeru
Ano yuuhodou kara kikoete kuru kigi no koe ya hibi no zawameki...

Here with me, I’ve got 99 facts!

Guys don’t actually look after good-looking girls. they prefer neat and presentable girls.
Guys hate other flirts.
A guy can like আপনি for a minute, and then forget আপনি afterwards.
When a guy says he doesn’t understand you, it simply means you’re not thinking the way he is.
Are আপনি doing something?” অথবা “Have আপনি eaten already?” are the first usual প্রশ্ন a guy asks on the phone just to get out from stammering.
Guys may be flirting around all দিন but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.
When a guy really likes...

Some dreams stay with আপনি long after you've woken up.
...
Life may be just a dream, but how do we interpret it? What we dream at night can give us clues about what is important to us in waking life. Dreams help us to process our conscious thoughts and can give us new and important insights into the problems and challenges we face in the world. Although we may have strange and unusual dreams, there are a number of common dreams that many of us experience over and over again. Read the interpretations below for an explanation of symbols that seem to appear frequently in dreams.
...
1. Faulty অথবা lost...

Christian quotes...

"No, I don't know that atheists should be considered as citizens, nor should they be considered as patriots. This is one nation under God."
- George H.W. গুল্ম

"ATHEISTS, AGNOSTICS AND NON BELIEVERS ARE THE TRUE CRIMINALS OF THE WORLD COMMUNITY" - tencommandments.org

"How can there be peace when drunkards, drug dealers, communists, atheists, New Age worshipers of Satan, secular humanists ... and homosexuals are on top?"
- Pat Robertson

"... atheism is none other than raw depravity - the diabolical principle at work in people who dishonor their parents, murder, lie and commit...