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Lady sits down on a train. Man sitting পরবর্তি to her turns to her and says, “Lady, that is the ugliest baby I have ever seen. That baby looks in a mirror, it’s going to shatter. আপনি oughta put a bag on that baby’s head. That baby is just ugly.”

The woman, horrified, stands up and shouts for the conductor. “Conductor, this man has insulted me.”

“I’m so sorry, ma’am,” the conductor replies. “What he did is totally unacceptable on this train. I will deal with him later, but for now, please come with me. We’ll give আপনি a nice আসন in the first-class carriage — and a কলা for your monkey.”


Guy in a লাইব্রেরি walks up to the librarian and says, “I’ll have a চীজ বার্গার and fries, please.”
Librarian responds, “Sir, আপনি know you’re in a library, right?”

Guy says, “Oh, sorry. [in a whisper] I’ll have a চীজ বার্গার and fries, please.”


A boy asks his father, “Dad, are bugs good to eat?”
“That’s disgusting — don’t talk about things like that over dinner,” the dad replies.
After ডিনার the father asks, “Now, son, what did আপনি want to ask me?”
“Oh, nothing,” the boy says. “There was a bug in your soup, but now it’s gone.”


Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went camping.

They pitched their tent under the stars and went to sleep.

Sometime in the middle of the night Holmes woke Watson up and said: “Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what আপনি see.”

Watson replied: “I see millions and millions of stars.”

Holmes said: “And what do আপনি deduce from that?”

Watson replied: “Well, if there are millions of stars, and if even a few of those have planets, it’s quite likely there are some planets like Earth out there. And if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life.”

And Holmes said: “Watson, আপনি idiot, it means that somebody গাউন our tent.”


During a cold winter দিন a wife messaged to her husband that “the Windows frozen”.
Husband replied to pour some warm water on them.
After a while husband received a message again “No way, the computer is completely spoilt now”.!

Patient: Doctor, please can আপনি help me out?
Doctor: Yes, আপনি may make your way out the same way আপনি come in.


Teacher: John, tell me your তারিখ of birth?
John: July 13th
Teacher: on which year?
John: it is in every year, Ma’am!

What is the difference between a teacher and train?
A teacher always says “spit your gum”, while the train says “chew chew chew…”!

What will be a Math teacher’s পছন্দ dish?
Pi!

Sam called helpdesk to solve his computer issue.
Helpdesk: “Sir click on “my computer” প্রতীকী to the left of computer screen”
Sam: “my left অথবা your left?”!

AND ONE আরো FOR APPRECIATING MY পূর্ববর্তি ARTICLE

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cell phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker-function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen.
MAN: “Hello”
WOMAN: “Honey, it’s me. Are আপনি at the club?”
MAN: “Yes”
WOMAN: “I’m at the mall now and found this beautiful leather coat. It’s only $1,000. Is it OK if I buy it?”
MAN: “Sure, go ahead if আপনি like it that much.”
WOMAN: “I also stopped দ্বারা the Mercedes dealership and saw the new2006 models. I saw one I really liked.”
MAN: “How much?”
WOMAN: “$68,000.”
MAN: “OK, but for that price I want it with all the options.”
WOMAN: “Great! Oh, and one আরো thing….The house we wanted last বছর is back on the market. They’re asking $950,000.”
MAN: “Well, then go ahead and give them an offer, but just offer
$900,000.”
WOMAN: “OK. I’ll see আপনি later! I প্রণয় you!”
MAN: “Bye, I প্রণয় you, too.”

The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room are looking at him in astonishment. Then he smiles and asks: “Does anyone know whose phone this is?

WILL TRY TO POST আরো LATER!
added by edwardcarlisle
Source: didyoukno
posted by theprettiergirl
This is spell to turn into a mermaid I haven't tried the spell hope it works.
The spell:
1. Go into the bathroom with your favourite নেকলেস on.
2. Get in the bathtub and sit in the tub closing your eyes softly.
3. Say this:
Magic spirits of the deep I would like a tail not 2 feet beauty be upon me মাছ all kinds let me see when I'm finished in the sea when I'm dry my feet return to me.
4. Dry off really fast আপনি need to be completely dry.
5. Touch some water and আপনি will become water that has turned out to be bubbles and আপনি will get a tail but আপনি do not decide the water decides the colour of the tail. Also আপনি will get powers when আপনি do something hard but not with in water.
Don't look at the full moon otherwise the moon will put a spell on আপনি but the spell the got put on আপনি will end in the mornings.
posted by soutarouful
Why does your cat lick your hair অথবা face? The first thing a kitten knows is its mother licking. Grooming conveys প্রণয় and caring.

Why does a cat seek the visitor who doesn't like cats? Ignoring a cat is the opposite of aggressive behavior, so the cat sees this as "cat-friendly" and inviting.

Why does your cat head-butt you? The cat is প্রদর্শিত হচ্ছে affection.

Why does your cat rub against you? মার্জার have scent glands on their cheeks and are marking আপনি as their territory. Same goes for rubbing on furniture.

Why does a cat sometimes clean its পশম after being petted? Either the cat is getting...
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added by breebree446
"Sometimes আপনি wanna give up cause আপনি dont think that আপনি can make it. But in the end you'll be ok. Things will come and go.

You have to hang tight, hold on, be strong, সরানো on, and keep your chin up. Cause tomorrow you'll deside on another way.

When everything inside আপনি hurts, আপনি just cant believe how it always comes back so much wrose. Just when আপনি think আপনি had all আপনি can take, just stick up your head and know that আপনি will always have a better day.

Somedays it can be hard and feels like the world is spining. Its never easy but we have rough times to try and build up our character not...
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posted by উন্ডওয়াকারগাই৪৩০
Ya know, having watched a lot of চলচ্চিত্র in সাম্প্রতিক time, I have come to realize that my attention span is short. I mean, it’s way better than when I was a kid, but it still takes a lot for me to pay attention to a film, even ones I like. I প্রণয় চলচ্চিত্র like Miller’s Crossing and It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World, but sheesh, two and a half hours. Great movie, highly recommend it, but I am not comfortable sitting in one spot for too long. But when a movie really grips me, really gets me, and I want to see it fully, I will pause it, go and do something else, and come right back, rather than...
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posted by উন্ডওয়াকারগাই৪৩০
আপনি all know me. I প্রণয় me some Skullgirls. I প্রণয় me some 2nd and 3rd Encore. I প্রণয় those animations and combos and characters, and I was always happy to see what Lab Zero would do next. And low and behold, after another fundraiser, we get news of another indie game দ্বারা them, another visually impressive game known as Indivisible. Everything got me excited. The character design, the music, the intro that was animated দ্বারা Titmouse and Studio Trigger. The entire game looked beautiful and got me excited. I waited for a full বছর for the game to get ready, and I paid the full forty dollar price...
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added by zanhar1
added by TheLefteris24
In case y'all haven't noticed I've kind of had some serious wanderlust lately. Like at this point there are so many beautiful places I'd be down to go anywhere that isn't where I've been living my whole life lol. At any rate here are 5 আরো breathtaking places.

1. Maldives

Honestly this one is actually probably in my শীর্ষ 5, I actually didn't discover it until after typing my first article. The Maldives are tied for first on my 'to visit list'.

For one thing the Maldives is প্রথমপাতা to a bioluminescent সৈকত (a সৈকত that has glowing water) and I have always wanted to visit one of those. They are...
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I kinda wanted to write this প্রবন্ধ just to get this topic off of my chest. If আপনি guys haven’t know already, which আপনি should have, this character has a special place in my heart. She is a character from BlazBlue series and she’s the BEST GIRL that could ever exist. I প্রণয় just everything about Nu-13. She’s both cute and badass at the same time! I’ll be explaining my five reasons why I প্রণয় Nu-13 so much.

1. Her design
    
I প্রণয় both of her normal and mecha battle suit. I প্রণয় how her swords behind her battle form placed together like a pair of wings for her. I...
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added by shaneoohmac13
posted by alexischaos2004
Hello everyone who happened to click on this, my name is Alexis, and this is Fanpop.



So, আপনি may have heard about a website called DeviantART, correct? আপনি probably have knowledge on what goes on there. Apparently, there's a lot of shit that goes on over there! So, in today's commentary, I'll be sharing my thoughts on this heap of fanfiction/art.


DeviantART is a large website where people all around the world can share their own works of art. আপনি can also post literature and whatnot. This is a way of socializing on the internet, and this site is very popular. When there's the pros, there's always...
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Hi everyone!

This প্রবন্ধ will rank the যশস্বী I think are most attractive from least to best. And obviously this is just my opinion :)

Female:

10. Bae Suzy

One of the most beautiful K-pop idols. She looks so graceful and sophisticated yet cute at the same time.




9. Gracie Gold

The Olympic স্বর্ণ medalist for figure skating a while back in 2014. Her smile is just adorable :) I want it. And her makeup is awesome; she looks so cute.



8. Elizabeth Taylor

Those eyelashes, those বেগুনী eyes, that face, that figure . . . she was just gorgeous overall.



7. Audrey Hepburn

My পছন্দ classic...
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So a while back I made two প্রবন্ধ about my পছন্দ villains and why I like them specifically but what about the bad guys just makes them so enticing for me? Heck I may have even typed up an প্রবন্ধ like this before, but with a years later with a new perspective, alongside an updated তালিকা of my শীর্ষ 25 fictional villains, I decided that it's time to reveal why I like the bad guys so much.

Top 25

Some of them are refromed অথবা simply played an antagonistic role but are not super evil. Won't state which ones are reformed because spoilers.

1. Azula (Avatar)
2. Regina Mills (Once Upon A Time)
3. Bellatrix...
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 Enjoy!
Enjoy!
(WARNING: There is quite a bit of profanity in this article, so if that bothers আপনি in any way, please contemplate পাঠ করা something else. Thank you.)

Alright before আপনি whine like an immature five-year old troll without their দুধ bottle and scream out "FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY'S IS OVERRATED!", just hear me out. I like the games for their surprisingly deep story, fun game play, memorable animatronics, and dark atmosphere.

Oh but Jared, this is the internet! How DARE আপনি have an opinion, you'll get destroyed দ্বারা the hater army!

WELL আপনি KNOW WHAT I DON'T F**KING CARE WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK, THIS...
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This just came to my head while listening to these songs, so here I go! Oh yeah, these are my very first reactions, so they won't always make sense XP
Lyrics are like this
(Thoughts are like this)
Let's go!


Hearing শিরোনাম for the first time: (Whaddya think he's gonna do, get a mop and clean আপনি up?)

This might be wrong, but here's all I know, here's all I know
(Well unless you're stupid অথবা have amnesia, আপনি are wrong.)

Most times I pretend that he's just a friend, he's just a friend
(Good.)

Yeah I'll try to make our hearts beat in time
Even though your rhythm might not be with mine
(It will not. It would...
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(No লিঙ্ক in this তালিকা because not only does it screw with my auto-correct, but I am pretty sure nobody is lazy enough to look these songs up themselves. Sorry.)

Alright fine, I admit it. I was tired of me starting new প্রবন্ধ and never finishing them, so I sort of rushed the শীর্ষ 5 Catchiest songs ever made. I mean heck, it's only a শীর্ষ 5!

And also, HUGE BIG MAJOR Shout-Out to a person named Todd Nathonson for helping me realize some of the even better songs out there.

So let's get down to it. আপনি will see some old ones, but tons of new candidates on this NEW AND IMPROVED list.

Let's get started!...
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